One Weakness

One of my resolutions this year is to lose the last 33lbs on my body that I have wanted to lose for the last few years. These are the stubborn pounds. You know the ones. The ones packed on by pregnancy and depression. The ones packed on by happiness and sometimes joyful eating. The birthday pounds, the Dr. Pepper pounds, the "I can't believe I used to eat so many Oreo Cookies!" pounds. Throw in a few one too many trips to Chick Fil-a pounds and that pretty much sums up my last 33 pounds that I have to lose. I try to be kind to myself and I break it up this way: Lose 10 for Camilla, another 3 for Peanut, another ten for Emmaree, and the last 10 for Jothan.

I can do this.

So far? I have given up Dr. Pepper, yes even the occasional one. Except for when we hit the movies, I will forever enjoy my tub of popcorn and drink shared with my lover. I have given up chocolate. I thought that would be harder, but I don't really like it anymore. I find that with most things, once it is given up, it isn't desired. Just like Chick Fil-a and their mighty delicious shakes that now taste like bung. Among all of these things and more that I have given up, the one thing I am struggling...S T R U G G L I N G to give up is my homemade bread.

For years I made it. Except the space in time when I blew up three bread makers. Oddly, I don't think they really want you making bread in them 1, 2, or 3 times a day. Go figure. However, when gifted a Kitchen Aid, I realized thanks to my bestie Leisha, that you can make homemade bread in something besides a bread maker. (I kid.) While it lasted for a bit, I found it difficult to get my bowl washed every day...I mean, I am -the- laziest dish washer ever. (Thank heavens for my two oldest who now rotate every day emptying the beastly dish washer so I can load it ...bless their hearts.)

I do have proof from those yummy days of kneading, and my little joyful helper by my side.

Butter. I don't know how I could ever give that up either.

All shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 at f/2.8, on Kodak Portra 400 Film

Recently, I asked Santa for a bread maker for Christmas. Not one of those cheapy models from Target or heaven forbid, Wal-mart. No, no, no, I asked for a big girl bread maker. One I hoped wouldn't die after 10 loaves. Santa tried mightily to find one, but ended up bringing me an iPad instead. Meh. I'll take the iPad. However, my desire to give my family good, wholesome, homemade 'pioneer -like' bread wasn't satiated. So, I hit my local thrift store and found another cheapy bread maker. For $10 we are enjoying home made bread again, and after joking it needed to make us 6 loaves to pay for itself, it has now hit the 15th loaf mark and is still going strong. However, it is making it humanly impossible to resist eating it's goodness. The smell is SO good. The loud buzzer screams my name, "Kim! Kim! Kim!" and I have indulged. A lot. Even yesterday when I swore I wouldn't, I ended up eating two slices. (These slices are GIANT so it is a big deal, I promise.)

Here I go again, to prep another loaf. My hips are screaming, "Don't do it!" My PMS on the other hand is screaming, "Don't get dressed, sit on the couch ALL day and eat nothing but that bread. In fact, don't even slice it, grab the cube of butter and the huge loaf and wrap that quilt around you and eat away." Sigh. Maybe I'll start not eating you tomorrow, Mr. Bread. Maybe.

What is your one weakness? What is that one thing that calls your name, SCREAMS your name to eat it?

I want to know.

**Edited to add recipes.**

White Bread Maker Bread

Add ingredients into bread maker in order listed. Set bread maker to 1.5lb loaf with a light crust. Start bread maker when finished adding ingredients. 3 hours later enjoy the smell and taste. Yum.

1 Cup warm water
3 Tbsp olive oil
3 Tbsp granulated sugar
3 Cups bread flour (Yes, this definitely makes a huge difference in texture and taste.)
1 1/2 tsp salt
2 1/2 tsp yeast

French Bread

Thank my bestie Leisha Kelsey for this one.

1/2 Cup warm water
2 Tbsp yeast
2 Cups warm water
3 Tbsp sugar
1 Tbsp salt
1/3 Cup olive oil
6 Cups flour

Mix 1/2 Cup warm water and yeast in a bowl. Let stand 5 minutes. Add 2 Cups water, sugar, salt and oil. Add flour and stir until blended. Dough will be sticky. Cover and let sit for 10 minutes. Stir. Repeat 3 more times. Shape dough into 3 long, skinny loaves or 4 round loaves. Allow to rise for 45 minutes or until doubled in size. Bake for 15-20 minutes at 400 degrees.

Let me know how it goes, and if you eat the entire loaf like me.