kim orlandini photography

Simply Thankful

2012-02-15T09:16:00.001-08:00

Today I am simply thankful that those big hands on the bottom are safe.

Our iPad was stolen from Flavio yesterday. We are all pretty shaken at the story. Although we hope that our story will turn out similarly to this one, we are pretty sure it won't. However, there is nothing like this situation to put us in our place and realize the things that are important in life are not 'things'. They are the ones we love. As long as they are safe that is all that matters.

Take time today to love on the real people in your life. Put the 'things' away, and focus on them.

**Get geeky: Shot on a Nikon N80, 50mm 1.4 lens at 1.4 with Fuji 800 Consumer Film processed at Walgreen's**

City Creek Center Sneak Peek Gala Event

2012-02-14T12:34:00.000-08:00

Thrilled would perfectly describe how I felt when I was asked to tell you about the new City Creek Center in downtown Salt Lake City. Flavio and I have been heading down to the new area since Deseret Book and the Blue Lemon opened last year. I adore eating at the Blue Lemon for lunch or date night and take anyone I can for any special opportunity.

City Creek Center will hold a Charity/Preview Gala on Wednesday, March 21, the day before City Creek Center opens, from 6:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. I can't help but think how awesome this center will be for our city, and people, there is going to be a Tiffany & Co. Utah is getting all grown up. I am stoked. Now, to convince Flavio I need a gift from Tiffany & Co. this year for our anniversary. (*Hint*)

Adult tickets are $50, but each person will receive a $20 VISA card for ticket purchase. Each ticket purchaser will also receive deals at the shops, along with being one of the first to shop at City Creek Center before it even opens.

The night will include complimentary parking, continuous entertainment, food and refreshments throughout the center and shopping throughout the evening.

I think the most amazing thing about this night is that all of the proceeds are going to benefit people and animals in need in our city. City Creek Center Charity Gala will 100% benefit local charities, including The Road Home, Ballet West, Junior League of Salt Lake City and Utah’s Hogle Zoo.

Information about this event, as well as how to purchase tickets can be found at City Creek Center’s website http://www.shopcitycreekcenter.com/charityevent.asp.

I have been so excited to share this night with you, and I hope beyond hope to see you there, that I went and photographed a few of my favorite things about City Creek Center. Enjoy:

More information about the Gala Benefit:

CITY CREEK CENTER TO HOST “SNEAK PEEK” GALA BENEFITING FOUR LOCAL CHARITIES
SALT LAKE CITY — City Creek Center, the new shopping and dining destination rising in the heart of downtown Salt Lake City, will host an exclusive charity gala and shopping event on March 21, 2012, from 6:30 pm to 9:30 pm, the night before the center’s official grand opening. Tickets are now on sale, benefiting four local charities.
The approximately 700,000-square-foot shopping center, with nearly 80 stores and restaurants, will host an evening filled with live entertainment, food and drink crafted from local ingredients, and an opportunity to shop and preview the center’s stores, which will open for the event.
“The gala is an exciting opportunity to experience City Creek Center for the first time and also support local charities that are important to the community,” said Linda Wardell, City Creek Center general manager. “One hundred percent of the ticket price will go to these deserving charities to help accomplish their missions.”
Tickets can be purchased for $50 directly from the benefiting charities, which include the following:
Ballet West
Ballet West ranks among the top professional ballet companies in America, with 36 company members, 10 second company members and a thriving Academy that trains dancers of all ages. Each year Ballet West's extensive community outreach and education programs serve over 100,000 Utah students, teachers and special needs individuals, free of charge, as a part of its commitment to the people of Utah. These efforts are supported, to a large degree, by the generous contributions of individuals. Established in Salt Lake City in 1963, Ballet West boasts a rich and varied repertoire with elegant and versatile artists and has become an American pioneer in the world of dance. Visit www.balletwest.org.
The Road Home
The Road Home is a private non-profit social service agency whose mission is to help people step out of homelessness and back into our community. On any given day in Salt Lake County, Utah, The Road Home provides emergency shelter for 700 people, gives emergency assistance to 150 people, and case manages nearly 500 households in housing throughout the community. The Road Home administers more than $400,000 in tenant based rental assistance annually, manages 26 transitional housing units, and operates Palmer Court, 201 units of permanent supportive housing for families and individuals experiencing chronic homelessness. Visitwww.theroadhome.org.
Utah’s Hogle Zoo
Established in 1931 and located at the mouth of Emigration Canyon, Utah’s Hogle Zoo is open all year and is one of the most visited attractions in Utah. With natural terrain that covers 42 acres of tree-lined pathways, visitors can view more than 800 animals. New in 2012 is Rocky Shores. Reflecting the look and feel of historic Cannery Row on the northern California coast, Rocky Shores features expansive new homes including an underwater viewing for bears, sea lions and harbor seals. Other animals include river otters and bald eagles. Also visit Asian Highlands, a re-creation of a Himalayan village featuring five endangered Asian cat species, and Elephant Encounter which spotlights African elephants and white rhinoceros. Hogle Zoo’s mission is to nurture respect and appreciation for the natural world by providing diverse educational, recreational, and conservation opportunities. This is accomplished through imaginative exhibits and programs, professional animal care, and a commitment to excellence. For more information, visit www.hoglezoo.org.
The Junior League of Salt Lake City
Serving the Salt Lake community since 1931, the Junior League of Salt Lake City is a charitable organization of women committed to promoting volunteerism, developing the potential of women and improving the community. Since 1990, the League has been involved in critical issues facing the environment, women and substance abuse, mentally ill adults and health care issues. The League is comprised of more than 550 women, including career women, working mothers, stay-at-home moms and full-time and part-time volunteers. Visit www.jlslc.org.
About City Creek Center
City Creek Center opens March 22, 2012 at 10 a.m. Bordered by South Temple, 100 South, West Temple and State Street, the center is located in the heart of downtown Salt Lake City, just blocks from I-15 and I-80, and a 10-minute drive from Salt Lake City International Airport. The centerpiece of a sustainably designed urban community, City Creek Center features a unique shopping environment with a retractable roof, a creek winding through the property, a pedestrian skybridge and more. Anchored by Macy’s and Nordstrom, this world-class fashion and dining destination will offer approximately 80 stores and restaurants in a casual, walkable environment. Visit www.ShopCityCreekCenter.com.
CONTACT:
Leigh Dethman, Intrepid, 801.481.9482, ldethman@intrepidagency.com

**Disclaimer: I was given two tickets to attend the City Creek Center Sneak Peek Gala in return for writing this post. However, my love of the beauty of the new shopping area, as well as the views, restaurants, and stores are all my own.**

**Get geeky: All photos shot on a Nikon N80 with a 28-70 mm lens at 50mm at f4 on Kodak Portra 160 Film. **

Personal Work

2012-02-10T11:03:00.000-08:00

I was chatting with some good friends this morning about 'photo failure'. We as photographers get really down on ourselves sometimes. If color isn't right, if the shot isn't framed perfectly, if we happen to get a glimpse of some other work that is supremely amazing...we cringe and we beat ourselves up for it, and so we get down.

I hate feeling down. I decided a long time ago to not look at what other people are doing. I decided to focus on my own work and work hard at it, improve what it was I was seeing through my own lens and find who I am, and who I want to be.

The problem? I don't like a lot of the work I do, especially personal work. Oftentimes, to save money I shoot my personal work on off brand film. This usually means the color is kind of whacky and the grain is chunky chunk, or I have a local 1 hour lab process my film, so the photos aren't as clear or sharp as my client work.

So they sit.

They sit also because I am busy with all five of my jobs as Jothan likes to calculate them all for me.

Then today, the discussion with my friends got me thinking...and looking...for awful photos. You know what? It was hard to find some. I found photos I loved. Even in bad lighting and off film and horrible processing. I still think they are lovely, they are personal, they are my heart, and I love them. I love the way I see through the lens and these photos only make me want to capture more and more.

Hope you enjoy these today. They were taken for SassyScoops at Sammy's Cafe in Pleasant Grove I truly feel all of my work shot for SassyScoops is personal, and I love the opportunity it gives me to shoot products, food, and people in a new light. You will see that the film stock and color as well as processing are very different from my client work. It is almost night and day...and yet I still love. It is a messy kind of love, and artistic kind of love and I am going to embrace it forevermore.

Here is to more personal work shot in 2012, and more showing it on a regular basis.

Oh, and I miss summer. You?

**Get geeky: Shot on a Nikon N80, 50mm 1.4 lens at 1.4 with Fuji 800 Consumer Film processed at Walgreen's**

Simar Newborn | Utah Newborn Photography

2012-02-09T14:26:00.000-08:00

I would love to meet you and photograph your newest addition in a similar way. These moments are all too fleeting. Let's capture them forever. Contact me: kimorlandini@gmail.com to set up your appointment.

View the entire session and order prints here .

Love Stitched

2012-02-08T13:36:00.000-08:00

When I was contacted by the creative mastermind behind Love Stitched last year, I was thrilled. After a few emails, it was decided that we were a good fit for one another, and so, I was given the task of photographing the fall line of beautiful one of a kind headbands and necklaces.

Brittany is a stunning lady inside and out. We hit it off instantly, spilling secrets, sharing life stories, we had so much in common. It was nice to find someone with whom I work so well with. As we discussed both of our visions for her pieces, we came to an awesome consensus and above is the fruit of that labor.

I am so excited and thankful to meet with Brittany again to discuss her spring line and photograph some of her newest creations.

Check out the Love Stitched Etsy Shop to snag up some of these delightful one of a kind, hand made pieces for yourself.

**Get geeky: All photos shot on either a Nikon N80 with a 50mm 1.4 lens at f4, or a Nikon F100 with a 28-70 mm lens at 50mm at f4 on Kodak Portra 400 Film. **

Story@Home Ticket Winner!

2012-02-07T15:06:00.000-08:00

...and the winner is:

Commenter number 26:

Super congratulations to Cecily!

A few reminders:

Story@Home is offering a Sweetheart Special. Everyone who registers by February 14th will be entered into a drawing. The winner will receive 2 tickets (one refund for her and a ticket for someone she loves).
Anyone who registers for the conference by February 25 will receive a swag bag full of AMAZING goodies.

For more information and to sign up to attend the conference and hear me speak (yippee!) click the image below. Hope to see you all there.

Faith | A Very Long Post

2012-02-06T10:10:00.011-08:00

I feel impressed to share the following story with you. I am not exactly sure why, other than I couldn't sleep last night because I felt I should. Some may call it a testimony. I prefer to call it a story so that you will read it. I write it more as a reminder and witness to myself more than anything. My hope is that it touches you for good in some small way.

I am one who loves my religion, but would never ever think of 'shoving' it down someone's throat. I believe deeply, and yet I keep it to myself because I believe everyone has the right to their own beliefs. Life is too short to live anything but happily. For some it is in religion, for others it is not. I guess I feel like if someone is interested in knowing what I believe they will ask me. I am an open book.

I am the only active member of my religion in my immediate family. Some members of my family are no longer members of my religion. A lot of people don't know that and it surprises them. For me, it is no big deal. I find solace and peace in my religion...most of the time.

**Get geeky: Self Portrait shot on a Nikon N80 with a 50mm 1.4 lens at f9 Kodak BW400CN Film using studio light. **

Recently, especially the last few months I have been struggling deeply with my religion. I think this is normal and that everyone needs to take time in their lives to really seek out what they believe, if anything at all. This is healthy even. Flavio and I went on a hike for our date this week. We had a really long discussion about how I was feeling in regards to my testimony of our church. I was afraid of verbalizing my struggle too much. It was nice to talk it out with him, to get his perspective, to hold his hand and feel like my best friend was there with me once again, helping me through life's struggles instead of being part of the cause of them. I loved that.

I have been praying. A lot. Yesterday we were placed into a new ward. Our third ward in the same Stake in the last three months. Crazy right? I was excited for the change, and as I walked into this new building with my two oldest children, and we sat down, I felt it. It felt right. It felt like home. Then, a friend from our old ward who came to our new ward with us got up and bore her testimony in testimony meeting about praying with her children to find her keys. She said that while her husband was out of town she had misplaced her keys. She has three young children and was feeling very alone and frustrated after looking for 45 minutes for these lost keys. She looked everywhere and could not find them. It wasn't until after she knelt down in prayer and asked Heavenly Father to help her find them, that she indeed found her keys. In the pocket of her coat. The same pocket she had checked five times in the last 45 minutes.

I felt a stab to my heart at that moment. All of my searching prayers were answered in that moment. The months and months of anguish and pain. The months of trial and sadness and despair were gone in that moment as my mind reflected back to one of the worst days of my life, and the witness I received that day that there is indeed a God. There is a Heavenly Father and that He knows each of us deeply and intensely. He is there. There is no other explanation in my heart or my mind other than He is real. I will share this very sacred story with you now.

March 11, 2011 is one of those days that will forever be burned into my memory. I can sit back and feel that day with every fiber of my being. It was a Friday. Date night. Our ward was having Ward Temple Night (a night that you get together and attend the temple to do Temple work with your spouse and ward members). I made plans that night to attend the Temple. In the early afternoon I mentioned this to Flavio. He was laying on the bed as I was getting ready. He mentioned to me that he would not be able to go into the Temple with me that night, but that he would still like to go with me and wait for me in the lobby, and that afterward he wanted to talk to me, to discuss something with me. I knew immediately what it was he wanted to talk to me about. Not specifically really, but that it had something to do with why our marriage was in the dumps and why I was a huge wreck for the last weeks upon weeks. I had felt the tearing apart of us, and here it was, he was going to tell me what exactly it was that had happened to create this void between us.

I was angry. There was no way in Hell that I was going to go to the Temple that day and do work while knowing that he would be waiting outside for me. I was pissed. I was angry. I was crying, not sure what to do. My heart was pounding inside of my chest and I was feeling very confused and upset. I remember locking myself up in my bedroom closet. I was a heap of a mess on the floor. I was hyperventilating and hot tears stung at my eyes. Somehow in the next hour I was able to get up, get myself ready, even though the Temple was the last place I wanted to be, I knew he would not tell me what he needed to tell me unless I went. I had been trying for weeks to get him to open up, but he wouldn't...so I guess more for myself than for him I decided I would go. I got my Temple clothes ready, but could not find my Recommend (a card that lets you enter the Temple to do work or witness sealings (weddings) etc). It was no where to be found. I looked in my usual places. My camera bag, my Temple bag, Flav's suit coats. I remember leaving it in the junk drawer the last time I had used it. I looked through that drawer three times. I was so, so, so angry and the anger only grew as I could not find my Recommend. I. Was. Pissed.

I returned to my bedroom closet, in hot, messy, snotty tears, I knelt in an angry prayer to God. I yelled and pleaded with Him. I told Him that I knew that my family was in trouble. I told Him that I was very much aware that my life was about to change in the next few hours. I very much felt like I gave Him an ultimatum. I told Him that if His church was true and that He wanted me to go into the Temple that night that He would have to seriously intervene because I could not find my Recommend. I let Him know in so many words that I was about to lose my mind and that whatever I had left in me would not be put into finding my damn Recommend. (Yes, I used the word damn.) He had five minutes. It was all I was going to give Him to help me find it. I got up from that prayer. I walked to our junk drawer. I opened it up.

Sitting right on top of the pile of papers was my Temple Recommend.

No one else was home. Not my children. Not Flavio. I had just searched through that drawer, three times. It was not in there before, let alone not on top of that pile of paperwork.

I won't go into how awful that night was or how terrible it was to be in the Temple sobbing my eyes out or bawling in the fetal position on the floor of the dressing room.

However, I will tell you this, that there is a higher power. I know this with all of my heart and I cannot deny it. I have been lifted up by love from a Supreme Being in my life. I was reminded of this yesterday, and after being so sad and lonely and confused for the past few weeks, clarity came once again as I was reminded of March 11, 2011.

Hebrews 11:1 1, Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

Sometimes faith is also the evidence of things seen. I am proof of that. I was able to hear myself say yesterday, (The one person I needed to hear say it more than anyone else.) "I believe." I believe that He even helps people find silly things like lost keys and Temple Recommends.

(Come back tomorrow to see who won the Story@Home ticket giveaway!)

Jothan's Day

2012-02-03T11:28:00.000-08:00

**Get geeky: Shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.0 with Kodak Portra 400 Film **

November brought a lot of good memories for our little family. After Jothan turned eight, he made the decision on his own to be baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The day was beautiful, filled with a thick dusting of snow and lots of blue skies and sunshine. I was so happy that so many of our wonderful friends and family, both members of and non members of our church could be there to support this big mile stone in Jothy's life. It meant so much to Jothan, and to me as well.

Jothan is such a good boy. He loves to be creative in many different ways. He loves to draw and to write (just like his mom) and he loves to play. He is also really likes to make sure everyone is happy and taken care of, sometimes to his detriment (also, just like his mom). This worries me some because I really want him to learn from my mistakes that sometimes you just have to make yourself happy, stick to your convictions and realize that you aren't always going to make everyone happy, sometimes you have to take care of number one...yourself before you can take care of anyone else around you. It is a fine balance.

However, I love and adore this attribute about him. He reminds me so much of myself. He is my sweet boy, my star, and my sunshine. I am thankful everyday for this little man in my life. Sometimes I think he is the only one who understands me. I love when he has had a hard day at school and all he longs to do is 'cuddle' up on the couch with me. He loves to have his back scratched and doesn't like to ever miss our nightly ritual of reading the scriptures, and our latest adventures with Harry Potter. He is such a strong boy, and a protector. He loves his sisters with his whole heart and even though they get on his nerves, he does all that he can to protect them and keep them safe and to let them know that they are loved and adored as well.

He will go far in life. I am sure of it.

Resolution

2012-02-02T16:03:00.000-08:00

Unplug.

Everyday.

At three o'clock MST.

If at all possible.

My favorite part of the day is unplugging and leaving my work, the Internet, the noise, right here. In a nice little pile.

Life is much happier spent with my family.

Nothing feels better.

Just Be You | A Life Lesson Learned

2012-02-01T15:37:00.000-08:00

Almost a decade ago I was a much different person. I cared a lot about labels, and making sure I didn't ever leave my house without makeup on, or my hair done. When kids came into the picture, I cared slightly less about how I looked and more about how they looked. Jothan always had to have his hair coiffed just so. His clothes were always clean and ironed and his outfits always included a matching pair of sandals or shoes. He was styling to say the lease.

Then Emm came along. I felt pretty much the same way about this new baby as I did her older brother. I bought her adorable little outfits with the cutest little shoes. She wore headbands and hair clips, and surprisingly, while I thought I would be -that- mom who always had a bow in her hair, or her hair up in cute little pig tails, or fancy hair dos, I am happy to say that I never had that desire when it came to her. Instead, her hair was cut short into little bobs since the time she had enough hair to do so. Around 6 months of age, I realized that she really didn't need shoes to match every outfit, instead I came to the conclusion that since it was summer and I would much rather see her naked piggies and be able to kiss and munch on them all day instead of stuffing them into adorable sandals. The sandals? I would never remember what they looked like, but if I kissed on stinky chubby baby toes all day, they would become ingrained into my mind and into my soul.

Somehow, they did. They still are. If I close my eyes and breath deeply enough I can still smell those little summer baby feet. I can feel their squishy baby softness on my lips, and I remember them.

Fast forward to today:

Somewhere between the years, I realized that letting my kids just be who they are, letting them choose what they want to wear would be a much better reflection of who I am as a mother, and what I mean to them as my children. I didn't need to run the perfect show. Somewhere along the line when I decided that perfection meant something completely different than I thought it did, I let go.

Then I got Camilla.

See? There was a lesson I needed to learn. She has solidified it's teachings to me. She has her own mind, her own heart, her own passions (just like her big brother and sister) and she has taught me to let those things blossom and bloom in her, and in turn, in her siblings.

She likes to wear what she likes to wear and I am so happy to oblige.

Now? Well, now my kids can be found wearing 3 shirts to school (layered, just like Jothan did today...weird but he loves it and feels 'cool'). Now? Emms can be found wearing funky tee shirts and skirts, and leggings and boots of all differing colors and varieties and she looks adorable. She loves it and it inspires her to become a 'fashion designer' some day. How can I crush that dream ever? For Camilla, it is apparently backward Curious George panties and her black boots, half a pair of pajamas, topped off with upside down sunglasses. Who am I to judge?

I am not, and I won't. Ever.

Because, what it really comes down to are photos like these captured forever, and the moments when they want to leave the house like that, and I let them, because they are beautiful inside and that is all that matters.

Take their advice.

Just be you.

Besides, who on Earth could resist those knobby knees? (Be still my heart.)

**Get geeky: All photos shot on a Nikon N80 with a 50mm 1.4 lens at f1.4 Kodak Portra 400 Film. Processed at Walgreen's One Hour Photo**

Story@Home Conference | Giveaway

2012-01-31T10:15:00.000-08:00

I adore a good story, whether I am sitting over a yummy lunch chatting about the craziness of life, or if I happen to be reading blogs or facebook status updates, or my favorite, cuddling on the couch at night reading the scriptures or our newest favorite, Harry Potter I love stories.

Even better for me, I love writing stories. I love to write the story of my life through this blog, and I love to capture that life through my photography. At the end of every year we create a family year book of photos and short stories to keep for generations to come.

I cannot wait for our 2012 yearbook already, aren't these photos begging for a story to be told?

I am SO excited to attend the Story@Home conference sponsored by CherishBound and FamilySearch. The conference has three tracks: Blogging, Storytelling and FamilySearch (family history). I am excited to learn more about story telling, to bring back to my blog and help me document my life in a better way through my words. I know a lot of friends who would benefit from the blogging track, to get started telling their own life's story. This conference is going to be amazing!

No matter how you tell your stories – through your family history, at your child’s bedside, on your blog, or from a stage – your stories matter. Join us for a conference that will change the way you see your stories and the world, and help you connect in new ways with those you cherish most.

Workshops and performances by award-winning storytellers, performers and speakers, will help you explore ways to use the power of story in your home. You’ll be able to record your own story, start on some research to learn more about your family’s history, get started on a blog and learn how to tell your story through social media.

After reading over the agenda, I am stoked to see all of the phenomenal speakers and workshop presenters. People like C Jane Kendrick, Rustin Banks of BlogFrog, and Rachael Herrscher of Today's Mama.

Guess who else will be hosting a special box lunch keynote during the blogging track? Well that would be ME. Yes, can you believe I have been asked to speak at this amazing conference? I am still pinching myself. Come and see me will you? Mrs. R will also be speaking at the same box lunch keynote. Thrilling.

So, how can you get your ticket you ask? At $79 (meals not included but coupons/discount cards will be in attendee goody bags) for the two-day conference, this deal is amazing. The entire conference is located in downtown Salt Lake City. The conference has secured a special room rate at The Plaza Hotel downtown; rooms are only $79 a night. What an amazing rate!

Hurry and register. Seating is limited and the conference may sell out before a winner of the giveaway is announced. If you purchase a ticket and then win, you will be issued a refund for your ticket price.

Kim Orlandini Photography is giving away one (1) full-conference pass to Story@Home!

To enter, leave a comment telling me which track you'd most like to attend.

For extra entries, do any of the following. Each of the following counts as an additional entry. Please leave a separate comment for each one you do.

"Like" Story@Home on Facebook.
"Like" Kim Orlandini Photography on Facebook.
Follow @KimOrlandini on Twitter.
Tweet about this giveaway with @KimOrlandini in your tweet.
Update your Facebook status with a link to this giveaway.

Giveaway ends Friday, February 3 at midnight.

Winner will be notified by email.

P.S. Story@Home is offering a Sweetheart Special. Everyone who registers by February 14th will be entered into a drawing. The winner will receive 2 tickets (one refund for her and a ticket for someone she loves).

**Get geeky: All photos shot on a Nikon N80 with a 50mm 1.4 lens at f1.4 Kodak Portra 400 Film. **

Zion's Mercantile Provo, Utah | SassyScoops

2012-01-30T10:45:00.000-08:00

Last week I had the amazing opportunity to attend a review of Zion's Mercantile in Provo, Utah with SassyScoops.

I always enjoy going on reviews with SassyScoops and photographing yummy food and fun stores. This time was no exception.

**Get geeky: Shot on a Nikon N80, 50mm 1.4 lens at 1.4 with Kodak 800 Consumer Film processed at Walgreen's**

Perfect Doesn't Exist

2012-01-26T09:54:00.000-08:00

**Get geeky: Shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.0 with Kodak Portra 400 Film **

As I lay in bed this morning, contemplating what I would blog about today, my mind drifted to a lot of different topics that have been brewing lately. There is so much I want to share. I got up, I checked my email, and my answer was there in a comment from Becky. Becky sent me a link to this beautiful article on perfection. I loved reading the article. I agree with so very much contained in it.

My mind thought back to almost five years ago to another article I came across when cleaning out my basement. The article is titled, What Does it Mean to Be Perfect? Reading this article five years ago was life changing for me. I recently shared this same article with a friend struggling with perfectionism. I could see myself so clearly in this person...well, I could see the 'before reading the article Kim' in this person. It made me so sad. When I say this article changed me, that is almost an understatement.

Growing up, I always tried my best to be perfect. I struggled deeply with Perfectionism problems. If I wasn't perfect in my home, in my grades, in my driving record, in my friendships, I would sink into a deep, deep depression. Perfectionism ate up my entire teenage experience with feelings of self doubt and unworthiness. Perfectionism destroyed many years of happiness between my husband and myself. Almost seven years of our marriage were wasted because I couldn't be perfect. I pushed my husband away because I was afraid if I wasn't a perfect wife to him I would fail. The irony is, I failed in my marriage because I believed I wasn't worthy of being loved by him because I couldn't be pretty enough, or skinny enough, or keep the house clean enough. None of these things were piled on me by Flavio. Not. One. I put it all upon myself. All of it. I was to blame.

I can remember distinctly reading this article. I was sitting cross legged on the basement floor, facing the gray wall and the scarlet colored bin of magazines was right in front of me. I can clearly see the magazine open on my lap. I can remember reading the words, and seeing the table describing "Doing Your Best" and "Perfectionism". It was then that I realized, at the tender age of 25 that I had messed up my entire life thus far. I had quite literally f***** up my life to that point. I put that word, because quite literally that is what I had done. I had wasted so much of myself by being afraid of messing up, or trying and not ever being satisfied with what I had accomplished because it wasn't perfect. The weight I had put upon myself and my shoulders was unbearable. I remember that day with so much clarity. I can feel it. I can hear the sound of my heart beating. It was that day I decided that I would never struggle with Perfectionism ever again. I would never fall into that trap again.

That day I set about trying to make things right in my marriage. I tried to fix all that I had done wrong. I apologized deeply and sincerely to my husband. I tried from that day forward to be a better mother, not a perfect mother, but just try to be the best me I could without all of the other stuff getting in the way. I changed that day. Not perfectly...but I changed in small ways, trying always to love myself. It wasn't easy, it still isn't easy, but I am much happier for it. I no longer try to be perfect. It is a much better way to live, a much easier way of life.

The sad thing? My marriage had deteriorated so much by that time, that my apologies were not enough to fix it. That part wasn't my fault. That is what is so beautiful about life...we each bestow within us the ability to fix ourselves, to be our own best, no one can make us do it, we have to decide on our own who we will be, who we will forgive, how we will move forward.

Sadly, it would take another five years to even reach a rock bottom in my marriage. It took an affair, a separation, a very near divorce only weeks ago to hit that bottom and find something to push off from and even attempt to swim back upward. Right now, we are 1/100th of the way back up from that terrible and painful bottom. It will be a long, tiring, excruciating journey, but we are finally back on this journey together.

Sometimes the journey is really hard. It is really ugly. Sometimes I feel so alone. I am thankful I no longer carry the weight of trying to be perfect. If I did, it would make this journey so much harder and I guarantee I would fail miserably, or I would have failed long, long ago.

If any of you out there are struggling with Perfectionism, I encourage you to look inside yourself and really see what you can let go, what you need to keep striving for, and make your lives better. I promise it will be one of the most freeing experiences of your life. I promise you will come to know yourself in a way you never knew was possible, and in the process you will actually become better than you ever imagined.

Happy Birthday!

2012-01-24T10:43:00.000-08:00

These photos from last year are proof of how much I did not feel up to doing anything, like blogging. It is almost painful to look back at 2011, especially early 2011. There are things hidden behind eyes. Even looking at the photos causes my breath to catch in my throat. However, I am determined to get them all up and make for lost time, I should have done it anyway, feelings aside.

That, however is not what this post is about. This post is about last year on this same day when Flavio turned 33 and Miss Emm turned the big 5. Today, they turn 34, and 6 respectively. I can't believe it.

I love to see how excited she was about her present. Exactly what she wanted. This year I am so afraid that she might be a little bit sad that I got her Legos (which she wanted a month ago) instead of her newest want, an American Girl Doll. I just couldn't afford the American Girl Doll with all of her accessories that Emm wanted. Maybe we can save up to get her for Christmas this year. Knowing her, she may change her mind before then.

She is so sweet though. I wrapped her presents with the help of Milla, we colored on brown paper with markers and set them out for her to open up this morning. Emm refused to open them though. She wants Jothan to be home to see her open them. This is proof of what a wonderful girl she is and what a lovely young lady she is becoming. I am so thankful for her and for her love and consideration of others.

She woke her dad up this morning with a huge grin, and wished him a very happy birthday. She then came in to wake me up with the same beautiful smile so I could wish her a happy birthday. Who does that? She does. I love her for it. So does her dad.

Last year's festivities:

Last year all she wanted was a Tangled Doll. I wish I remembered what we did that day. Perhaps we went to see the movie? This is why you don't stop recording your life. You forget!

Don't forget the gorgeous Flynn Rider. Is it possible to crush on a cartoon character? Because I do.

She is so tiny. Love her trying on this baby crown.

My beautiful mom and my beautiful girl.

The birthday boy with the birthday girl. She adores him.

The most amazing cake ever, made by the amazingly talented Ashlee from I'm Topsy Turvy. She and I did a trade last year, photography for cakes. I will be posting her birth story later this week. Come back and see the awesomeness. It was so fun getting to know Ashlee throughout the year. This year everyone will be sad because they get boxed cake. (Thanks to Holly for letting me borrow her Bundt pan so that it looks a little fancier.) It was fun while it lasted.

Here is hoping this year is just as magical for both of them. I love them both so very much and I am so thankful for both Flavio and Emm. They make me smile, they make me laugh, they make me feel loved.

**Get geeky: Shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.0 with Kodak Portra 400 Film pushed to 800**

Anderson Family Sealing, Bountiful Utah

2012-01-23T16:41:00.000-08:00

I was so happy when I got an email from the Anderson family. Last year about this same time I had the opportunity to photograph their sealing to their middle little boy in the LDS Bountiful Temple They are so amazing and so full of love for their three little boys who make me smile and melt my heart. Thank you for choosing me to capture your special day.

If you would love for me to capture your special day in a similar way, drop me a line. I would love to talk with you! kimorlandini@gmail.com

View entire session and order prints here .

**Get geeky: Shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.8 with Kodak Portra 400 Film**

Full Breaths

2012-01-20T08:59:00.000-08:00

I am SO thrilled to share the rest of this session with you next week. This session was some of my best and most favorite work which I shot for an etsy shop. I love etsy. Love, love, love, love. I also love Brittany, who I will introduce you to next week. Her shop is lovely. She is my kindred spirit, but I am giving too much away, so you'll have to come back and see the rest of the amazingness. (Amazingness is not a word, just so you know.)

For now, the reason why I will lock up my daughters until they are 30:

This week has been, well, it is hard to explain. Even as I type this out my breath is catching in my throat and I am not letting in the deep kinds of breaths. All week, they have been anxious, and shallow. I realize I am doing it, only too late to make up for the hours I have been doing it.

Life has been insane. I don't say that contritely. It is legitimately insane. For once, the majority of it has nothing to do with my own marriage, but rather people close to me suffering deeply in a similar circumstance that my husband and I have been suffering in. It has been SO weird to be on the other side of this, watching someone else and their once beautiful marriage crumble and not be able to do a thing about it. I have wondered if that is how people have felt about my marriage with Flavio. Stuck on the sidelines, not breathing deeply, wondering what to do, when really there is nothing that you can do.

My heart aches. Tremendously. It makes me want to fight all the more to make my marriage stick, while at the same time, when I see this family suffering, I can also see why dissolving the marriage is more bearable. It is so hard to be in the thick of the yuck. I have gotten so many texts from this family this week. They are all hurting, crying, sorrowing, and there is nothing that I can say except, "You have to just endure this. You have to go through it. There is no way out of it otherwise."

Then? I find my breathing shallow again. My anxiety heightens and my heart hurts all over.

This week? Yep, it has been crazy. I don't see the crazy ending anytime soon. I see it getting so much more awful before it can get better. I hope and pray our awful...you know, the awful my husband and I have endured, I hope the worst of it is over. I never want to be in the thick of the muck again.

Thanks for listening. Have a beautiful weekend everyone. I have a family session tomorrow. I am looking forward to it with so much happiness, then I get to assist at a wedding with one of my best friends.

Can't wait.

I hope we can all breathe a little more deeply this weekend.

Much love,

Kim

**Get geeky: All photos shot on a Nikon F100 with a 50mm 1.4 lens at f4.0 Kodak Portra 400 Film. **

Laura's Bridals, Salt Lake Library | Utah Wedding Photography

2012-01-19T14:46:00.000-08:00

Getting married? Would you love to have me photograph your special day? I photograph a handful of weddings each year. I would love to talk with you and see if we would be a good fit for one another.

Congrats Laura!

View entire session and order prints here.

**Get geeky: Shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.8 with Kodak Portra 800 Film**

The Clarkston Pageant | Clarkston, Utah

2012-01-18T14:02:00.000-08:00

More goodness from the 2011 Orlandini Family Archives.

I have never been to Clarkston, Utah. Honestly, I had never even heard of Clarkston, Utah until my step-mom called me up one day and asked if my family would like to go to The Clarkston Pageant .

We were in.

We hopped in the car for the two hour drive. It was a beautiful and stunning summer evening. My kids were so excited to be getting out of the house, and I was smart enough to actually remember to bring my camera. Win. Win.

We arrived in Clarkston, which, basically, if you blinked you might miss. The town is so tiny. My kind of town.

(See what I mean about half of her face? That Diva!)

The pageant is based off of the life and story of Martin Harris, who was one of the witnesses of The Book of Mormon. See the link above for more information. While I liked the pageant, and the drive, and the time spent with my family, I am not sure we will ever be back. It just wasn't -that- incredible.

The highlight for me was walking around the cemetery. I love old cemeteries. Utah is too young for really good cemeteries in my opinion. However, they still get to me. I love reading the names, seeing the dates and wondering about the kinds of lives these people lived. They were like us. Mothers, fathers, children, babies, grandmas and grandpas. I am fascinated by their stories.

Perhaps that is why I do what I do. Blog, journal, photograph. I want my life to be tangible in some way, so that when I am gone, someone will know all about us. What we did for fun. What made us laugh. What made us cry. What kinds of things made us weak. What made us strong.

I love remembering.

I am grateful to have the memory of this night, and most of all? To remember Camilla's awful hair cut.

What do you hope people remember about you?

**Get geeky: All photos shot on a Nikon N80 with a 50mm 1.4 lens at f1.4 on Kodak Portra 400 Film. **

E.T., Barbie, and a Scarecrow

2012-01-17T14:06:00.000-08:00

A few things I am loving today (in no particular order):

1. Finishing up a roll of client film on my kids. I literally had 9 shots left on a roll I was sending for development. See all 9 shots below. Love doing this.

2. Camilla. She shoves everything in -front- of her face so I can only get half a glimpse of her always.

3. My kids love for me to photograph their -things-. I love photographing them -with- their things.

4. Scaring Mrs. R with the gifted E.T. doll that also makes my nephew cry. Go figure.

5. Emmaree consoling Jothan, Jothan consoling Emmaree, Emmaree and Jothan consoling Camilla, or any number of variations to this.

6. The three of them:

One thing I don't like? That baby toe right above walking out of my frame. However, I still love that baby toe.

What is one thing you love today?

**Get geeky: Shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.8 with Kodak Portra 400 Film**

Simar Birth Story, Salt Lake City, Utah | Utah Birth Photography

2012-01-16T15:12:00.000-08:00

I have been shooting birth stories like crazy the past year. For some reason I haven't been posting them. I promise, promise, promise to do better okay? As long as you promise to keep coming back to check them out.

Loved spending time with this beautiful mom and her husband as they awaited the arrival of their beautiful daughter. It was a stunning fall day, full of lots of sunshine. Near perfection.

Welcome to the world sweet baby E. Thanks for choosing me to capture the first hours of her life.

My favorite part? Waiting around to see her big sisters meet her for the first time. Be still my heart.

Enjoy:

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens all on 1.4 on Kodak Portra 400 and Kodak bw400cn Film

View entire session and order prints here .

If you are thinking about, or would love to have me capture your birth in a similar way, drop me a line: kimorlandini@gmail.com I would LOVE to discuss your upcoming delivery with you.

xoxo

Kim

A Pretty Tablecloth | Tutorial

2012-01-13T15:01:00.000-08:00

I have recently become obsessed with gray and mustard. Many people think it is due to the wave of gray and yellow on Pinterest. Honestly, I fell in love WEEKS before I even heard of Pinterest, but kudos to Pinterest for sharing my love of all things mustard and gray and making it easily accessible to love it all the more.

Maybe my love came from Target where I found these amazingly beautiful tablecloths and matching kitchen towels, hot pads, etc.

I bought four of them. Three to make roman shades (that I thank Pinterest for) and one to jazz up to put on my table.

"How did she jazz up a tablecloth?" you ask? Well, I shall show you. You will need the following:

One tablecloth, wide ribbon (can be satin or grosgrain, whatever you feel), and of course, pom poms (purchased from 4 different JoAnn stores.) I. AM. OBSESSED. However, that is more than likely an understatement. If I could wear an entire outfit of only pom poms I would.

Finding gray pom poms? Nearly impossible. Finding enough yellow? Almost as impossible...and even though they claimed to have the same dye lot number, they didn't and my yellow is interspersed with pom poms that look more like 'goldenrod'. What is goldenrod anyway? I can only think of the crayon. Blergh. Anyway, although it ruined my final product because the colors were quite off and different, I didn't let it get me down. The tablecloth is still cute and I still get lots of compliments on it, so I win.

To begin, pin the thick ribbon around the edge of the tablecloth, then sew, sew (remember I don't pin!). I used gray thread to match the ribbon. Sew along the edge near the edge of the tablecloth, then sew right along the top edge of the ribbon.

Next, change thread colors and sew the yellow pom pom fringe along the bottom edge of the ribbon and tablecloth:

It is as simple as that. Less than an hour of your time and you have this super duper fancy schmancy looking table cloth.

That is, until you wash it because, in reality you have children, and it shrinks and no longer fits your table.

Le sigh.

**Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/1.4 on Fuji Superia 800 Consumer film and processed at Walgreen's one hour photo .**

One Weakness

2012-01-12T10:45:00.000-08:00

One of my resolutions this year is to lose the last 33lbs on my body that I have wanted to lose for the last few years. These are the stubborn pounds. You know the ones. The ones packed on by pregnancy and depression. The ones packed on by happiness and sometimes joyful eating. The birthday pounds, the Dr. Pepper pounds, the "I can't believe I used to eat so many Oreo Cookies!" pounds. Throw in a few one too many trips to Chick Fil-a pounds and that pretty much sums up my last 33 pounds that I have to lose. I try to be kind to myself and I break it up this way: Lose 10 for Camilla, another 3 for Peanut, another ten for Emmaree, and the last 10 for Jothan.

I can do this.

So far? I have given up Dr. Pepper, yes even the occasional one. Except for when we hit the movies, I will forever enjoy my tub of popcorn and drink shared with my lover. I have given up chocolate. I thought that would be harder, but I don't really like it anymore. I find that with most things, once it is given up, it isn't desired. Just like Chick Fil-a and their mighty delicious shakes that now taste like bung. Among all of these things and more that I have given up, the one thing I am struggling...S T R U G G L I N G to give up is my homemade bread.

For years I made it. Except the space in time when I blew up three bread makers. Oddly, I don't think they really want you making bread in them 1, 2, or 3 times a day. Go figure. However, when gifted a Kitchen Aid, I realized thanks to my bestie Leisha, that you can make homemade bread in something besides a bread maker. (I kid.) While it lasted for a bit, I found it difficult to get my bowl washed every day...I mean, I am -the- laziest dish washer ever. (Thank heavens for my two oldest who now rotate every day emptying the beastly dish washer so I can load it ...bless their hearts.)

I do have proof from those yummy days of kneading, and my little joyful helper by my side.

Butter. I don't know how I could ever give that up either.

All shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 at f/2.8, on Kodak Portra 400 Film

Recently, I asked Santa for a bread maker for Christmas. Not one of those cheapy models from Target or heaven forbid, Wal-mart. No, no, no, I asked for a big girl bread maker. One I hoped wouldn't die after 10 loaves. Santa tried mightily to find one, but ended up bringing me an iPad instead. Meh. I'll take the iPad. However, my desire to give my family good, wholesome, homemade 'pioneer -like' bread wasn't satiated. So, I hit my local thrift store and found another cheapy bread maker. For $10 we are enjoying home made bread again, and after joking it needed to make us 6 loaves to pay for itself, it has now hit the 15th loaf mark and is still going strong. However, it is making it humanly impossible to resist eating it's goodness. The smell is SO good. The loud buzzer screams my name, "Kim! Kim! Kim!" and I have indulged. A lot. Even yesterday when I swore I wouldn't, I ended up eating two slices. (These slices are GIANT so it is a big deal, I promise.)

Here I go again, to prep another loaf. My hips are screaming, "Don't do it!" My PMS on the other hand is screaming, "Don't get dressed, sit on the couch ALL day and eat nothing but that bread. In fact, don't even slice it, grab the cube of butter and the huge loaf and wrap that quilt around you and eat away." Sigh. Maybe I'll start not eating you tomorrow, Mr. Bread. Maybe.

What is your one weakness? What is that one thing that calls your name, SCREAMS your name to eat it?

I want to know.

**Edited to add recipes.**

White Bread Maker Bread

Add ingredients into bread maker in order listed. Set bread maker to 1.5lb loaf with a light crust. Start bread maker when finished adding ingredients. 3 hours later enjoy the smell and taste. Yum.

1 Cup warm water
3 Tbsp olive oil
3 Tbsp granulated sugar
3 Cups bread flour (Yes, this definitely makes a huge difference in texture and taste.)
1 1/2 tsp salt
2 1/2 tsp yeast

French Bread

Thank my bestie Leisha Kelsey for this one.

1/2 Cup warm water
2 Tbsp yeast
2 Cups warm water
3 Tbsp sugar
1 Tbsp salt
1/3 Cup olive oil
6 Cups flour

Mix 1/2 Cup warm water and yeast in a bowl. Let stand 5 minutes. Add 2 Cups water, sugar, salt and oil. Add flour and stir until blended. Dough will be sticky. Cover and let sit for 10 minutes. Stir. Repeat 3 more times. Shape dough into 3 long, skinny loaves or 4 round loaves. Allow to rise for 45 minutes or until doubled in size. Bake for 15-20 minutes at 400 degrees.

Let me know how it goes, and if you eat the entire loaf like me.

Mending the broken parts.

2012-01-11T10:12:00.000-08:00

The past year has been a whirlwind of hurt and sadness and craziness. So many times I wanted someone to scoop me up, hold me in their arms, stroke my hair and whisper in my ear, "Everything will be alright." So many times I would find myself curled up in the fetal position in my bed, tears literally soaking my pillow wishing and hoping to feel some sort of calm and peace come over me instantly so that I would feel, somehow, someway that everything would be okay.

Those feelings didn't come often. In fact, they came hardly at all. Sometimes however, I would feel tiny whisperings of, "Be strong." or sometimes "You can do this." They were few and sparse but just enough to get me through the really hard times when the puddle of tears and snot was wade worthy.

I know that trials have an amazing ability to make us strong. They have an equal ability to make us weak. I cannot tell you the depths of weakness I have reached this past year. I have made choices and done things I am not proud of. All in the name of 'feeling'...something...anything. I have learned from these little self made trials just how real I am. How strong I am. I have learned what can make me eternally happy and what will never ever give me the happiness that I am so desperately seeking to find.

It is a slow process. A slow healing to this broken heart of mine. I have to remember to be kind to myself and to this tender heart. I have to remember that my husband's heart is just as damaged and that it will take us a really long time to heal one another, trust one another and fix what was once so wonderful. To us? The last 11 years are dead, and today starts a new life. A new relationship. Newly wed together in this, tied to one another. Fixing it together.

Together is a much better place to be than alone.

We're gonna fix this.

**Beautiful imagery courtesy of my good friend Duston Todd .**

The Quilt

2012-01-10T13:28:00.000-08:00

I didn't feel right writing about the quilt until I could write about what the heck has been going on the past year. It wouldn't have made much sense if I had written about this beautiful quilt so many people kept secret for so long, without, undoubtedly someone asking, "Well, why would they do that for you?"

Now you know.

I can't pinpoint exactly where the idea stemmed from. I think for the most part, what I understand is that Kenna and Ashley came up with this brilliance you see below:

With the help of two of my best friends, Leisha and Lindsey , Kenna and Ashley were able to create a secret facebook event titled, Quilt For Kim Orlandini. The message on the event read:

Now that Kim has gone somewhat public with some family issues that have been very hard for her to bear (http://kimorlandini.blogspot.com/2011/05/youve-got-every-right-to-beautiful-life.html), we wanted to do a community service project for her.

The idea was given to have a quilt made for her--you know, like giving her a giant hug from all her friends both IRL and online.

We would love for you to donate a 12 x 12 fabric square that we will have made into a quilt by a professional seamstress. We will not be getting together to do the quilt, so don't worry about that, we just need a fabric square from you! No sewing required by you. Just send us the cut piece of fabric!

This is a great way for all of Kim's friends from all over the world to get together and show her some love. Her photography, high school, adoption, blogging and work friends along with her neighbors, family and real-life friends are ALL invited to send in a fabric square.

Details on the Fabric: It can be anything you like. Pattern, solid, etc. You can even write a note to Kim on your fabric square using a fine point sharpie pen. Please make sure to leave 1 inch margins for the seam if you decide to do that. Again, no sewing required, just a cut piece of fabric.

We would like to get this quilt to Kim as soon as we can, so if you could have your square sent off by JULY 1st, that would be wonderful!

Kim does not know about this little project. We think she would be embarrassed if she did, so we are going to keep it on the down-low. However, you are more than welcome to invite other friends to the private group if you think that they would like to join in.

I can honestly say I had NO. CLUE. THIS. WAS. HAPPENING. None. The only thing I noticed was that Lindsey and I had A LOT more friends in common than I ever realized. I think a couple of times I wrote on her wall, "Hey! I didn't know you knew so and so! How do you guys know each other?!" So funny. Poor things.

There was literally HUNDREDS of people invited to donate cloth for this quilt. There were messages of love written in ink. There were messages of hope stitched into the squares. I literally spent hours pouring over each square. Touching them, reading them, laying on them.

I even spilled Dr. Pepper on the corner. I joked that I would wrap myself up in the quilt and cry in the corner while sucking on the Dr. Pepper corner to calm myself. Don't worry I didn't do that. I washed the Dr. Pepper out...and the quilt still looks beautiful.

A beautiful square from Wendy:

"Sometimes God calms the storm...sometimes He lets the storm rage and He calms his child." With her cute little boys' hands stitched on them.

One from I believe Megan Hilton:

"Here's to hope."

And many more beautiful thoughts and sentiments and fabrics:

When the ladies gave it to me, I went into shock immediately. I never in a million years would have imagined such kindness towards me. So much love shown to me. It meant so very much to me. It is times like this when I go quiet and reflective. My heart was so deeply, deeply marked for ever for good from this gift from you all. My heart is touched. It is full. I can never thank those involved enough. I can never thank Kenna enough for the long hours she put into organizing this event and sewing the beautiful quilt, all while dealing with personal health issues. Thanks to her and to her mother in law for all of her help with this blanket for someone she has never even met.

Thanks to each of you for your contributions, whether it was fabric, or prayers, comments, or nothing more than a hopeful thought.

Hope is winning today. Something I wasn't sure would ever happen.

Here is to more hope. Always.

3-Oh

2012-01-09T10:49:00.000-08:00

I cannot tell you how excited I am to leave my 20's behind. Today is the day that happens. Sometime around 10 something this evening I will officially turn the big 3-0. I am thankful for it. I am excited about it.

I finally feel like I have found myself. Oddly though, I am sure ten years from now I will feel exactly the same about leaving my 30's behind, but for now I am anxious to see what the next years of my life hold in store for me.

I laid awake last night for an hour or so. My husband had his hand on my neck. He was fast asleep. I couldn't help but let my mind drift back over the past year of our lives. The past months have been crazy. They have been hard. My last birthday was miserable. We were so utterly unhappy. I didn't realize at that time why were were so unhappy. I remember hitting my knees so many, many times begging Heavenly Father to just make things better. I begged for mercy from the incredible pains we were enduring, so many, many times. My husband (who has so lovingly agreed to let me blog my feelings in order to share how we are changing and growing through this...for which I am thankful) was very much distant from me. I now understand why. I understand where his heart was last year at this time. Last night those thoughts hit me like a ton of bricks. I couldn't shake the sadness. I thought of this photo below which is very much how I have felt my entire twenty ninth year:

I felt separate from him. I was sad. I was barely keeping myself together, most days I would say I wasn't keeping myself together at all. The day before these photos were taken one of the last bombs dropped.

Only two and a half short weeks ago my marriage was on the verge of ending.

I said the awful words no one with children, no one who once upon a time loved their spouse fully and unconditionally should ever have to say: "I want a divorce."

I was the one to say it.

There. I said it.

Even more? I wrote it.

The question on everyone's mind the past year, answered.

It sucked. It is sad. It is embarrassing.

Most people won't talk about it, or don't because the world tells them they shouldn't, or people in their religion tells them they shouldn't. That is so silly. That is so dumb. All that tells us is that people all over the world are living sham marriages. Things always look good and perfect and happy at church on Sunday, when in actuality I am positive I was not alone in living sadly and hopelessly. I can tell you here, I wasn't alone. It wasn't until I said something that I stopped feeling so alone. I got so many beautiful emails from my readers in support of me. Knowing my pains, having been in my shoes. Readers giving me hope and support. Some saying, "You can get through this!" Others saying, "You may not get through this!" Many saying, "I know what you are feeling, I have been there, thank you for being brave enough to share this!"

I didn't feel brave. I was broken, I was absolutely 99.9% broken. My soul was crushed and I had nothing left to give to my marriage or to my husband. I very much felt like someone has covered me in honey and left me in the sun on top of an ant hill to die.

This has been a very ugly and terrible place to be.

It is a place I hope to be far, far, far away from with each day that passes from this one.

I was ready to head into a new unknown life. I was highly prepared to live alone, to be single, to be with just these littles (who have absolutely no knowledge of the struggles of their parents and I would like to keep it that way)...

However, life threw us back together. To a new unknown, one in which we are holding on tight to one another. 29 was a roller coaster year of my life full of nothing but plunging abysses, the deepest known to man. We are finally, after months and months and months and months, beginning the slow climb back up to the light. To the fun parts, to the good parts, to the happy parts. We begin my thirtieth year here:

A shadow of what we were. Nothing but a shadow. We begin anew and try equally with all of our hearts to put one another first and always. To build on our new beautiful relationship, and hopefully show the world that forgiveness is possible. Love is possible. Hope is possible.

I am happy for 30. I am anxious to see where it takes me, where it takes us.

**Beautiful imagery courtesy of my good friend Duston Todd .**

Our Little Helper

2012-01-06T09:33:00.000-08:00

The beginning of the year is always one of my favorite times of the year. Photography slows down, my new job slows down, the etsy shop slows down. Not that I enjoy that everything slows down, but I feel like I have time to breath and refocus my energy into my family. One of my favorite things to immerse myself in, is prepping our personal family photos throughout the year, to go into our family yearbook.

This year is no different. I love going through the archives and seeing the chubby little baby faces staring back at me. I can't believe how much each of my children have grown in the past year. Especially Camilla.

She is so full of life and attitude. I have never met anyone like her. The word that describes her best is "Diva". She is sweet and sour, but more sweet most of the time, but oooooo if you cross her you better watch out. One of my favorite qualities about this little girl however, is her desire to help. Just this morning she demanded to help her dad put a big heavy item out in the garage. She had to help hold the item all the way out. She loves to help clean, and fold laundry as seen below. One of her favorite things to do is to put the laundry away after it is folded. She holds out her little arms at 90 degree angles and waits for you to pile on the clothing, then runs into her room to put them away nicely in her drawers.

My heart melted when I came across these photos from a year ago. Here she is, only a wee little 18 month old, helping me with the laundry.

So thankful for her little helper attitude and for all of her other attitude. There is never a day that goes by that I don't laugh or cry because of how much love fills my heart and soul because of her. It took so much to get her here, her spirit was fighting for so long to get to our family, I felt it for so long that when she finally came, I recognized her as none other than the baby I too had been fighting for. I love you sweet Milla.

To my dear friend who is struggling today with a very similar situation we had on our journey to get our little Camilla, I want you to know that I love you Lindsey. It isn't fair that another person's choices can affect our lives in such a deeply painful way. However, I know your Hope is fighting to come to you. Somehow, some way she will come, and she will be just as big a diva as my little Camilla. I can't wait for that day and I hope and pray it comes soon.

Bubble Quilt | Tutorial

2012-01-05T13:26:00.000-08:00

I have no glorious photo of said quilt for you. If you want to see the finished product you will have to get by on the crappy photo at the bottom. Sad. I know. I also know that as a photographer the lighting I took these photos in was crap. It was late in the day when I started the tutorial, and I started the tutorial after having people ask me to make one, so there are photos missing from the first steps. I hope, however that you enjoy this tutorial nonetheless and if you decide to make this quilt, send me a photo of your finished creation. The greatest thing about this quilt is that it quilts itself as you go! Brilliant right? Well, that and it is so stinking adorable. Thanks to JaNean for showing it to me in a magazine and leaving me sleepless at night until I made my own.

This quilt can be made as big or as small as you would like. You can make it with flannel (highly suggested as then you can omit the cost and steps of cutting the batting) or with cotton fabrics. There are a million different designs you can do with this as well. You can make a stained glass look by doing a dark fabric on one side and brighter fabrics on the front, or you can make a scrap quilt (my favorite) by using all different colors and kinds of scraps. These turn out the best in my opinion and have been some of my favorites to see others complete. For mine, I used two coordinating fabric colors. JoAnn's has a lot of fun fabric lines that have coordinating fabric colors and options. If I did this quilt again I would probably just pick two fabrics and go that route instead of making myself crazy that two of the same fabrics may have been touching and getting a bit too friendly.

Let's talk numbers for a bit shall we? I like to go big on my quilts or go home. When you have 5 people in your family, three of which are small children who like to snuggle and get close, I have no other choice but to share my blanket. My quilt came out a bit smaller than I would have liked. It is more the size of a lap quilt than a queen size, but I will give you my calculations for making a HUGE quilt. (You will have to calculate how many circles you will need if you change the size. Bwahahahahaha!)

For a 84" x 84" quilt (This will be 12 circles by 12 circles if we are talking circle) you will need 288 cloth circles. If you want a quilt like mine, using 2 coordinating fabrics, that is 144 cloth circles of each color, so once all sewn up will become 72 circle bubbles of each color before sewing together. Make sense?

How much fabric do you need for said cloth circles? 20 yards. Yup. Ouch. (BUT! Oh so worth it) If you are going the route I did, I had a thin piece of batting between each of my cloth circles...for that you will need to cut 144 batting circles.

Math is hard, I know. I know.

Here we have the circle size below. You will need to cut a 10" circle template either out of heavy plastic or cardboard. Then another 7" square out of heavy plastic or cardboard. You will be using these A LOT.

Next, the part I didn't photograph because I never thought anyone would ask me how I did this blasted quilt...

Trace the circles on wrong side of fabric leaving 1/4" seam allowance around each circle when cutting them out. All 432 of them (fabric + batting). You will need to make sure to leave enough allowance between each tracing (that is 1/2") or else your circles will end up the wrong size when it comes to sewing them together and that will be messy. In essence your circles will be about 10.5" when you cut them out. Mine were not pretty, just sayin'. So when the tracing is done, then what? CUT, CUT, CUT, CUT, CUT, CUT, CUT, oh? Don't forget to CUT. Did I mention all the cutting?

Now the tricky part. Making the circle sandwiches and beginning to sew.

Place one of each color of fabric (just going off of my two color design) right sides together. Place a piece of batting on bottom of stack. Then alternate.

The sandwich will be as follows: light fabric right side facing dark fabric right side, then batting.
Next sandwich: dark fabric right side facing light fabric right side, then batting.
Continue for all the circle sandwiches.

Sew around each circle. You will be able to see the circle lines you traced. Just sew on that line as your guide.

See how ugly mine were cut out? I know, horrid right? This is a photo of one of the circle sandwiches sewn. (Batting side is up. Don't you love that adorable helping hand?)

Next, THE best investment I ever made back when rag quilts were all the rage, were these SUPER sharp self opening shears. They nip, nip, nip fast. Nip into the seam allowance as shown to reduce bulk when turning.

Next, close to the edge, cut a strip into the top fabric. Cut large enough so that the fabric can be turned inside out easily, but not so large or so open in the middle that it can't be covered by the next steps in the process. (Don't worry I will show you!)

Turn inside out and iron flat. (Did I mention I hate ironing and may or may not have ironed mine? Or maybe only half of my quilt? I know, sad.) You will be left with your little slit to one side. It is scary, I know, but please don't worry, all will be well.

Remember the 7" square template you made? Time to get that out and on the side with the slit you need to trace a square. Check out the photo below on the right. You can see my markings. I used a pen, you can too, I promise no one will ever see your tracing lines.

Continue forever doing all 144 of your bubbles until you have a stack that looks like this. Can you sort of see how the color goes every other one? Kind of? (I am a terrible teacher.)

Next comes the sewing, when all of it finally comes together. This quilt definitely needs to be pinned. There is no way you can sew it without doing so. It is just too bulky and needs to be quite precise or else it will not line up properly. I promise. This is coming from the queen of short cuts. Begin by sewing one light and one dark circle together. Line the straight squared lines together and pin at each end of the line. I hope that makes sense. See on the left there how the pin is at the 'corner' of the square? Please note that the slits in your fabric need to always be facing 'up' not down underneath your fabric. If you don't you will have to unpick. A lot. Sew that sucker together along that line and you will end up with something like the photo on the right.

Your two bubbles will look like this when sewn together. On the left you can see where they are sewn together and the extra bubble bulk is sticking up (kind of hard to see, but once you iron them down you will be able to see them better.) Then, you need to sew these rounded edges down flat. This is where the 'quilting as you go' comes in. It is super fun to watch this little guy, er uh...big guy come together. You can see on the right the bubbles are beginning to form and peek through. Total optical illusion. I love it.

Here they are a little bit closer:

I wanted my edges to have a straight seam. You can see in a photo below how you can leave your edges unsewn so they become scalloped looking. I preferred mine to be sewn so I did it. Just turn your circular edge along that square line and sew like this:

Continue onward until you have 12 bubbles quilted together. Then make another strip of 12 bubbles and pin and sew and quilt onto the first strip, until you have 12 strips.

Here you can see what it might look like with a scalloped edge, and here on the right the edge I preferred. Sorry I don't have a better example, I didn't think until later that you might want to see that. (See, terrible teacher.)

Close up of the back of the quilt. It looks very much like a patchwork quilt, and you can see the circles quilted into each square. So pretty.

Here you can see the front of the quilt. A close up of the bubble. It makes such a pretty pattern. On the right is the finished quilt with the peek a boo patterns poking through.

Things I learned:

I would make this quilt again, except I would use only two fabrics, one light and one dark to really get the stained glass effect. I think it would 'pop' more if I did. This quilt, while I love it, seems lacking.

This quilt is HEAVY. I might try it with JUST the cotton fabric and no batting. Although I am afraid. I am not sure how well it would hold up or if I would think it was too light for a quilt.

I would definitely make one out of flannel for a baby shower. Totally tiny and totally cute and totally easier than the batting which can get thick at the corners.

I broke no less than 15 needles when sewing this quilt. Did I mention it gets thick at the corners and that I am not patient?

That is about it. Let me know if you have any questions, and again, if you decide to make one, send me a photo I would love to oogle it.

Much love,

Kim

Gentle

2012-01-04T12:16:00.001-08:00

When I was younger, my brother and I spent lots and lots of time with our maternal grandparents. Mom and dad were divorced, Mom was working and we were lucky enough to have Grandma and Grandpa who had cable television. This gave us ample opportunity to enjoy Nickelodeon as well as reruns of any television show you could think of. I hadn't put much thought into those old shows until this morning.

This morning I was a wretch to my children. Not fully and completely, just on two occasions. The first? When my oldest was playing so sweetly with his baby sister when somehow her sippy cup was the supplier of her cereal bowl in her hair and her face. This was literally one minute before I had to be out the door to get big brother to school. I was ticked. Milk everywhere, dripping from the counter, the chair, the floor, the baby, the baby's hair. Grrrrr. I said. I used the dreaded word, a word I hate almost more than any other word, and dare I say more than even the 'f' word. "Stupid." "That was such a stupid thing to do!" Ick. I still feel badly about it. I hate myself for using it. I can't wait until he gets home to kiss him, hug him and apologize to him for using that word. He is anything but and the things he does are not stupid, they are things that little boys do to entertain little baby sisters to make them laugh. I am the one who was stupid. I am the one who needed more patience and gentleness in that moment.

The second occasion came when again, running a little late getting middle sister to school. (I work from home and constantly feel I never have enough time.) I asked Memms to find a brush to brush her hair for school. She couldn't find it. I told her where one was, she couldn't find that one. I of course, go into her room, find said brush and begin to brush her hair in a fury. Again, so angry and upset that she, "Didn't just look for it! It was right in front of her face!" Gah. I hate myself again. I am so rough, and so impatient over -the- silliest things.

As we were in the car on the way to school, I took a deep breath, looked her in the eyes and told her how much I loved her. I hugged her and apologized for being so impatient and so angry and promised I would try to be more gentle.

Then my mind wandered back to my own childhood. To the show Gentle Ben. I don't know what it is even about, other than a bear who, rather than eating everyone in sight, is actually a friend to a little boy who needed one.

Then I came across this photo of myself with my little ones.

Shot on a Nikon N80 with a 50mm 1.4 lens at f 8. Kodak Portra 400 Film

And. I. Laughed.

Life is way to short to be hard, mean, angry, and cruel. Even for a moment. I vowed today to try to remember to be more gentle. With my husband, with myself, and most importantly, with my children. They are so very little, so very impressionable. I want them to remember what a wonderful mother I was, how patient I was, how much they were able to learn from me instead of fear from me.

To Jothan, Emmaree, and Camilla? You are smart. You are the farthest thing from stupid I know. You are beautiful. You are capable. You all will go far and do amazing things. Of that I am certain of. Thank you for forgiving me for being more grizzly than gentle today.

xoxo

Kim

Family Night and Captain Moroni is a Super Hunk

2012-01-03T11:17:00.000-08:00

Family night is pretty much my favorite night of the week. I love the excuse to just stay home and spend time with the people who mean the most to me. Nothing trumps family night. No work is scheduled, no plans with friends or colleagues, it is just us, our little family.

While our religion is a big encourager of Family Night or "Family Home Evening ", I think any family can benefit from such a beautiful time.

My kids love the one on one attention. They love the last minute 'fake' family nights where we end up playing at McDonald's or Ikea, or a walk around the neighborhood pulling the wagon or holding hands in a train or riding bikes. They love sitting down for a special dinner at the restaurant while we talk and laugh and focus on each other.

Sometimes, like this night, we talk about our heroes from the scriptures. This particular night it was all about Captain Moroni . Pretty hunky if I do say so myself. Plus, any man who loves his family and people as much as he did is okay in my book.

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/1.4-2.8 on Fuji Superia 800 Consumer Film and processed and scanned at Walgreen's One Hour Photo

While I have put a huge emphasis on Family Home Evening in past years, this year it is my goal to make it even more special. My hope is to sit down to a real meal each week, look my children in the eyes more, laugh more, smile more, create more memories and document these nights through film more often.

Do you have Family Night? What are some of your favorite Family Night activities? I am looking for some good ideas for the upcoming year. If you don't have Family Night, you totally should.

To Write in 2012

2012-01-02T13:26:00.001-08:00

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/2.0 on Portra 400 Film

I was so lucky to have some down time this past week. I came across a few very spectacular blogs that reminded me how awesome it is to just read, and write, and share. I feel inspired and renewed and hope and vow to share more of myself in the coming year.

2011 brought a lot of challenges. If I am being completely honest, I can't really think of anything good that happened in the past year. It is pretty much clouded with despair and anger, and the death of so many dreams.

I realize greatly that the death of one year and the minute it takes to turn into a new year is nothing more than that, a minute. It shouldn't greatly change your view, or your way of thinking or life, but just like a lot of us, it is a renewal and a hope for better things to come. This is what I hope for 2012.

I hope to forget last year. Leave it there. I am packing with me the things I have learned from it, but the rest has been shaken off and is being left behind never to be heard of again.

This year? I am learning to love myself. Trust myself. Take care of myself. I am focusing on taking care of my family, keeping them fed properly, keeping our home feeling like a home, making dinner and ironing. The simple tasks that I avoid so often. This year? I am learning to forgive. Wholeheartedly and completely. I realize this doesn't mean there won't be set backs and pain along the way. I realize this doesn't mean things will be great, or even good, and I know that they will more than likely be far far from perfect. In fact, things may blow up and I may have to start again. However, it does mean that I will learn so much because my heart will be so full, so big, so much more open than I have allowed it to be. It knows what forgiveness is. I won't let it forget.

This year? I will allow myself to be worshiped and loved and cared for. I will be treated like the awesome, amazing girl that I am. I will be just a tiny bit more selfish without forgetting to be selfless.

This year? I am going to make my life amazing and everything that it should be, everything that I never felt I was worth enough for it to be.

What are you doing this year?

Happy 2012 everyone!

Finding Hope

2011-12-27T10:18:00.000-08:00

All shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 at f/2.8, on Kodak Portra 400 Film

I wish I could say I was the sole brain child behind this conceptual shoot. However, this session comes from my good friend Duston. This man oozes creativity. I attended his workshop last March where we learned a lot about shooting from our hearts and souls. He is going to be having another workshop in 2012. I suggest you check it out. I came across these images this week when looking for photographs to donate to my tiny friend Holden.

When I first shot these they were meaningless to me, everything was pretty much meaningless. I had just had the shock of my life given to me by my sweetheart. I was feeling like less than garbage. I was just days into the worst torment of my life. I left that workshop a heap of despair. I got the images back and there they sat for months and months until I came across them this week.

They speak to me now. I am this woman. I am the one bound and trapped. I am the one hoping and praying for release. I am the one wishing for shears to cut through the ties that are binding me.

I weep.

For as this woman has found her way out, I am still trapped, held, bound. I am struggling to breathe. To wish. To dream. To hope. My sadness is tangible, it is real, it is dark and it is ugly. For the first time in my thirty years of life I am struggling to know what to do, what steps to take. How to rely on anyone else but myself.

The problem is, I don't trust anyone. Least of all myself.

I come back to this blog for the next while. Not in hopes of sharing my portfolio, or my fun blogging adventures. Instead, to get back to the whole entire reason I started this blog, to share my innermost thoughts. The pathway ahead is rough, it is scary. I am at a precipice. There is nothing before me but a huge divide. I stand on the edge unsure of what to do.

Here I will find my refuge.

Here I will figure a way out of this pain that is binding me.

Here I will find hope.

Shops at Riverwoods | Provo, Utah

2011-12-12T13:45:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago I had the amazing opportunity to spend a morning with some fabulous ladies at the fabulous Shops at Riverwoods in Provo.

I had the honor of visiting Blickenstaff's Toy Store, Ike's Ice Cream the Provo Beach Resort, Zion's Mercantile where I got to meet the fabulous Robert Boyd and the day ended with a most exquisite lunch at La Jolla Groves Restaurant. A special thanks to the talented Bryce Olsen for photographing the event for us so that we could enjoy it all the more.

The morning started out at the beautiful and fun and my new favorite toy store, Blickenstaff's.

Where we got to play with toys to our heart's content. I love this about Blickenstaff's. A toy store where you can actually try it before you buy it. They also have so many unique toys as well as vintage toys. Check them out for your holiday shopping as they are having some fantastic deals for the 12 days of Christmas up until Christmas Eve.

Next we were blessed to try out the famous Ike's Ice Cream. Ike's is a quaint little ice cream shop inside Provo Beach Resort. It has an old time feel right down to the red booth seating and the old fashioned Coke machine. Oh and the ice cream is divine. This coming from a non ice cream eater. I did eat it and it was terrific. I will definitely be back.

Provo Beach Resort? Did you know Provo had such a thing? From an indoor ropes course to mini croquet to an indoor Flow Rider, Provo Beach Resort is the place to be this winter when it is icy and cold. The beachy fun can last all year through with all the activities available at the Provo Beach Resort. What is a Flow Rider? I didn't know either, but it is, well, you have to see it, the best way to describe it is to call it a surf machine. There are only three in the state of Utah, and Provo Beach Resort has one. Go and try it out, it looks like a blast.

Our next stop was the Zion's Mercantile . Full of beautiful artwork and replica's of vintage books and dishes, Zion's Mercantile is the place for those who love all things LDS history. My favorite items were the reconstructed Books of Mormon and guns from Porter Rockwell. It was so neat to see the kinds of things he liked to carry with him. If my grandfather were still alive he would most definitely be getting one of those from me.

Zion's Mercantile was where we got to meet the wonderful LDS photographer and artist Robert Boyd. You may not recognize his name, but if you are LDS or in an LDS community you are certain to have seen his artwork. It was so fun as a photographer to get to discuss his process with him and to pick his brain a little bit on how he captures his images and how he ends with the images he does. Beautiful art, beautiful man with a beautiful wife who it was also a pleasure to meet.

Our day ended with one of the most delightfully delicious meals I have ever eaten at La Jolla Groves. I loved meeting the owner and the chef. I loved to see their passion for the food they make and serve at their restaurant. The food is truly delicious. My favorite? It was hard to choose just one, but most definitely the Chicken Stuffed Crepes. They are also working on their seasonal menu. I personally can't wait to get back and stuff my body full of all of the deliciousness.

**Disclaimer: This was a sponsored blogging event. I received a very fun afternoon with some spectacular ladies. We were gifted a few fun items from each vendor, especially ice cream and lunch. I was however, not paid monetarily for this review and the opinions expressed herein are my own honest review of these companies.**

Healing

2011-11-17T14:01:00.000-08:00

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/1.4 on Fuji Superia 800 Consumer Film and processed at Walgreen's one hour photo .

Life has been incredibly insane the past six weeks. It is weird how the past few weeks really feel like a year. Can you tell I have been gone? I think I have been hiding and protecting myself from anything that I could. I have immersed myself in work and my kids and have been really busy, but when it came to the online world, it was kind of the last place I wanted to be. I felt like my blog was no longer a 'safe' place. That is weird right? Considering this is the Internet. I guess I found out in a very difficult way who can read it and for what purpose they could use it for. I have felt so many different emotions and feelings. I have a few more gray hairs, my forehead is looking a little more aged and I have just felt heavier.

I am so thankful to have the gospel in my life and to be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This realization has never been more clear to me than in the last two weeks, and especially in the last four days. Hubbs and I have had a lot of setbacks to our relationship in the last two months. It has felt very heavy and sad and I found out a lot of things a very hard way. There was much discussion as to how my blog has hurt him. I feel very sad that I he felt hurt by my blog which is why I have been hiding from it. I am not sure what to write anymore or how to share. I feel exposed greatly by a certain person who knows who they are. I have chosen in the best way I know how to share how I feel in my heart at this very moment.

As I mentioned, I am so thankful for my membership in the LDS church. I did not realize until the past week the difference a good and loving bishop can make in the life of a member of the church going through deep trial. While I have greatly loved past bishops, I have never really felt they connected with my soul in the way that was necessary for my personal growth. Six weeks ago I was in a very low point in my life. I didn't know where to go or who to turn to and I just felt I needed guidance from a priesthood holder. The spirit whispered that I should make an appointment with my bishop. I asked him at that time not to counsel me, but just to listen to my situation and at a later date, after much consideration to counsel me at a later time. I saw him again on Sunday, and the words he said to me were hard to hear and amazingly comforting at the same time. I have never felt so much calm and peace regarding my life, my family, my marriage as I have in the last four days. There is definitely a higher power and there is no denying that for me. I am grateful to have a good bishop who can show me what I need to change in my life to be happy, and that I sincerely deserve to be happy.

I am here to tell you that I love my family. Every single member. I love my husband in a new and deeper way than I ever thought imaginable. I am thankful to him for all of his help and for being an amazing dad to our children. This is something I have always longed for them to have and I know I made the best choice possible for them. I am thankful for the opportunity to become the best of friends and to watch our children grow and find happiness and joy through them.

While we are no where near perfect, and have a very long way to go to be completely better, I can honestly say we are well on our way. I just wanted to publicly thank those who have supported us and supported me through this very hard time. I am sure this will be the last blog regarding the issues we have had, and as long as things continue to go well there will be no need to share anymore about this. I just felt the need to come full circle and share that things are better and healing in a way that almost one year ago I never thought could be possible. So, thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

The healing is nice.

The Copper Onion | SassyScoops Review

2011-11-14T14:38:00.000-08:00

I have absolutely adored being an official Sassy with SassyScoops . I have made some amazing friends and have eaten some amazing food and met some amazing people because of it. This week I am dedicating my posts to telling you about all of the wonderful local establishments we have reviewed this past fall and to let you know if you should visit them as well.

We'll start with The Copper Onion in downtown Salt Lake City, Utah.

I have some friends who absolutely favorite The Copper Onion. It is their go to date night dinner place. I had gone there once before and had felt disappointed in the food and actually went home feeling a little sick. I wasn't sure if it was due to the dinner or something else I had that same day, so I was eager to give them another chance.

The decor is very 'homey' and rustic. I loved it. Other than our table being a little wobbly, it was nothing that a folded napkin didn't fix when I talked to the waitress about it. After that was fixed it was onto choosing delicious menu items.

The open kitchen was very fun and completely added to the atmosphere. I think it would be fun to go back and watch your dinner being made while sitting at the bar.

We ordered an abundance of appetizers (which are always my favorite part of any meal). The meat and cheese plate was definitely the highlight of my evening.

I chose the Carbonara. It was good, but lacked flavor. I ate half of it before the waitress came back and I could request some salt as there wasn't any on the table.

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/1.4 on Fuji Superia 800 Consumer Film and processed at Walgreen's one hour photo .

All in all, I doubt highly that I would ever return to The Copper Onion, and I would have been highly disappointed if I had spent my money on this place celebrating a special occasion.

Read the official Sassy Scoops review of The Copper Onion.

The Copper Onion

111 East Broadway, Suite 170

Salt Lake City, UT 84111

(801) 355-3282

http://www.thecopperonion.com

Twitter: http://twitter.com/thecopperonion

**Disclaimer: This was a surprise review. The Copper Onion did not provide SassyScoops or myself with any compensation (monetary or otherwise).**

...

Ride to a Witch | Gardner Village

2011-10-24T09:43:00.000-07:00

Our afternoon started out by getting some of our favorite treats from Gardner Village which generally included a caramel apple from Sweet Afton's.

Then we take a stroll through all the decorated shops and stopped to see all of the fun witches. We stopped at Naborhood Bakery for some yummy grub. The kids chose hot dogs while Hubbs enjoyed a self made creation on white bread and all sorts of delicious deli meats. I went with my favorite chicken salad although my croissant tasted like it has been sitting out on the counter all day.

As you can see, Millz enjoyed everything, if you know Millz that says a lot.

We then made our way to the lineup to visit the witches in their swamp. On our way Millz made a fascinating discovery:

And everyone posed for a photo.

We finally made it and right next to the ticket booth was my favorite witch in honor of Breast Cancer Awareness Month. She is so cute.

I adore how everywhere is decorated at Gardner Village. Makes me feel like somewhat of a good parent when I can take my kids places like this so that when they go home to their non decorated house they don't notice as much.

We got our 'tickets' which turned out to be some very life like looking rubber cockroaches. The kids adored playing with them, which was a good thing because we had a good 30 minute wait in line for our turn on the tractor.

Finally it was our turn and the kids adored seeing the huge green tractor and getting to go for a ride in the back.

It was a short ride and we were at the swamp where the witches lived. There was an old train car that was their house where we saw their yummy dinner cooking. I think it had lots of strange ingredients like bats wings and scorpion tails. They offered to teach me the recipe but I had my hands full with the three littles. We went and did a little dancing and learned the moves to Thriller, one of our favorite songs.

The kids then helped stir the huge cauldron that was outside brewing and simmering. It smelled terrible to us, but to the witches it was delightful. We made it out of there without being turned into frogs or kitty cats. Joth and Memms loved helping stir but Millz wasn't quite sure what to think about the concoction.

One of our favorite witches was the one who serenaded us with her fiddle to a rousing rendition of "Turkey in the Straw". We were all tapping our toes.

The evening ended with a very heartfelt old fashioned cockroach funeral. We all got to say a few words about how we felt about our cockroaches and we had a moment of silence followed by another rendition of "La Cucaracha".

The burial:

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/1.4-2.8 on Fuji Superia 800 Consumer Film and processed at Walgreen's one hour photo .

It was such a fun evening to spend with my little family. It was something that we needed and we want to go back every year and make it a tradition. Thank you Gardner Village for providing so many fun holiday festivities that we can create traditions and memories with our family.

I hope that you consider Gardner Village this holiday season and include all of their fun attractions from witches to elves.

**Disclaimer: Gardner Village provided tickets for me and my family free of cost, to enjoy their newest attraction Ride to a Witch. However, my opinions of the experience are my own, and my mom taught me never to lie, so the things you will read about my experience are true.**

Bocchino Family

2011-10-19T19:57:00.000-07:00

All shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 at f/2.8, on Kodak Portra 400 Film

With all the hullabaloo going around about Kodak. I am here to say. Film is Not Dead. This session is proof. That is all.

View entire session and order prints here .

Yo Gabba Gabba Winner!

2011-10-17T09:14:00.000-07:00

A HUGE thank you to all who entered to win the two free tickets to Yo Gabba Gabba Live! The winner is:

Commenter #34:

Wes said...

I like Sammy's

October 14, 2011 11:44 AM

Congratulations Wes! Hope you have a smashing good time and get on your Dancey Dance.

xo

Kim

Yoooooooooo Gabba Gabba!| Giveaway

2011-10-10T13:42:00.001-07:00

As you heard a few posts back, my family and I have recently discovered Yo Gabba Gabba. As luck would have it a week or so later I was able to meet Sam, the brother of the creator of Yo Gabba Gabba. Coincidence? I think not. Okay, well, maybe. I probably looked like a huge idiot when I freaked out, spouting my love and adoration for DJ Lance.

A few days after our meeting Sam emailed me and asked me if I would like to give away two tickets to see the LIVE Salt Lake City show coming to Kingsbury Hall on November 9. Would I? Uhm, you freaking bet. I may have even shed tears of joy when he offered to send my family to the show as well. Thank you Sam! (Please, next time you are in Provo head over to Sammy's for the DIVINE cupshakes and pie shakes.)

In addition to the giveaway, Yo Gabba Gabba is offering my readers a discount on their tickets to the Salt Lake show. To purchase, follow this link . Upon checkout enter the code "GABBA" for $10 off your purchase. How spectacular? VERY.

"It's time to dance!"

Let's get to the fun.

I am giving you 5, yes -5- chances to grab these two Yo Gabba Gabba tickets. Make sure to leave a separate comment for each of your chances to win. Each comment will go into a drawing and I will use random.org to pick the winner.

1- Leave a comment here on my blog telling me your favorite thing about Yo Gabba Gabba. It can be a character, a song, a celebrity spotting. Tell me!

2- "Like" Yo Gabba Gabba on Facebook.

3- "Like" Sammy's on Facebook

4- "Like" Kim Orlandini Photography on Facebook

5- Become a follower of my blog.

***Giveaway ends Monday, October 17, 2011 at 9 a.m. MST***

****Disclaimer: I was asked to giveaway two free Yo Gabba Gabba LIVE Tickets on my blog, and to share a discount code with my readers. I was given free tickets for myself and for my family to enjoy the show as well. However, if I had not been given the free tickets I still would have shared with you this awesome giveaway because, well, I am that obsessed with Jack Black making an appearance on my baby's favorite show. That is totally radical and everyone needs to experience and love Yo Gabba Gabba as much as I do.****

Sweet Sisters

2011-10-03T14:17:00.000-07:00

All shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 at f/2.8, on Kodak Portra 400 Film

I love these girls. As. In. L O V E. I have had the privilege of photographing them for the past two years. I am always amazed at the families who love and trust me to photograph them. I love that their children get to know me and trust me, and look forward to portrait day, instead of something unknown. They are more relaxed, smile easier, play faster. I just love. I love that they love me...well, all of them but maybe baby Shae. Sweet Shae, I promise to win her over. Thanks Vanessa for letting me capture your beauties once again.

I would adore getting to know your littles in a similar fashion. If you would like to start a photography relationship, drop me a line: kimorlandini@gmail.com and let's talk.

xoxo

Kim

View entire session and order prints here .

Trust

2011-09-20T13:23:00.000-07:00

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/2.0 on Portra 400 Film .

Yesterday was rough, as in Grade A tear your heart out rough, as in I didn't sleep very well rough. I am struggling to rebuild trust. I find the building of trust extremely confusing. On one had, you have to have it. You have to. Even just a teeny tiny bit of it in order to continue on. On the other hand, it is so easily broken, you have to wonder where you draw the line. Do you allow the 'little' things that break trust to go by without completely falling to pieces? It seems at this stage in the game tiny, or huge, it is all the same and can so easily bring my world crashing down.

Yesterday this happened and a very deep line was drawn. It may seem like a really silly and insignificant thing which caused this line to be drawn, but to me, as I said, at this point nothing is small or silly or insignificant. My blood pressure rises just thinking about it. My heart pounds out of my chest and I begin to shake just thinking about it. This time, the breaking of trust came with an ultimatum. I have never given ultimatums, so having given one I am so deeply afraid.

There is a line now. A line that if crossed, it becomes a finish line.

All night long I thought about how I drew this line. I was so angry and hurt, and the only thing I was thinking at the moment was to hurt back. Words flew out of my mouth. I shook, my heart would not settle. For hours afterward my heart was still pounding. I sat in the car and said a silent prayer. "Please Father help me. I am not sure if this is right, or if I should have said what I said, but when is enough enough? I am not sure but please give me strength to make it through tonight. Please help my heart to settle because I honestly feel like I am going to die right here."

Peace. Immediate peace.

At least until I got home again...then the agony set in.

I don't want to be in the predicament I am in. I don't want to be living this hell that I am living through right now. I don't understand any of it. Not one single ounce of it, and yet I am just thrust into it, seemingly again and again and again, and you know what? I don't think I can take much more...which is why on hands and knees I dug that line so deeply yesterday. So, incredibly deep that if crossed, life as I know it, as my children know it, as my husband knows it, will never ever be the same. Ever.

I may be strong, but I am not that strong. I don't think my heart can take anymore, even if it is silly and little and insignificant. It is significant to me, and I guess I have to matter more than anyone right now. That sounds incredibly selfish, and it is, but so be it.

Trust.

I need more of it.

Yo Gabba Gabba and Service

2011-09-16T11:17:00.000-07:00

A talk I gave last week just two weeks after moving into our new LDS Ward . I truly feel inspired to share it here, and no matter what your faith, religion, or lack thereof, the ability to serve and be served has far reaching effects and we all should make time for it in our daily lives, if anything, to make us better people and to make this world a happier place for all who live here. Happy weekend.

Shot on a Nikon F100 50mm 1.4 lens at f/16 on Portra 400 Film .

It is an honor to stand before you today and be the one to introduce my beautiful little family to you. There is nothing very unique or special about us, except for maybe our recent discovery and subsequent adoration for Yo Gabba Gabba. Okay, truthfully, Hubbs hates Yo Gabba Gabba, and I am not certain that Memms really, truly, hates it or likes it or if she is just pretending that she doesn’t like it, but do know that Joth, Millz and I are pretty much in love with DJ Lance Rock. You are probably wondering what does Yo Gabba Gabba have to do with her talk? What? You don’t know? Well, neither do I, I just needed something quirky to spark your interest in hearing my talk this morning, I think that might be something they teach you in public speaking, but I am not sure since I have never taken public speaking.

Hubbs was born in Sao Paulo Brazil, and spent the first 17 years of his life growing up and attending school there and in a small town just outside of the big city called Atibaia. He came to the United States to study English and attend university after graduating high school. Hubbs was able to master the English language and has studied at LDS Business College and Salt Lake Community College and later studied Accounting and Finance at the University of Utah. He is an eternal student who has 12 credit hours left, but now that he is almost done with school he is pretty sure he doesn’t want to work in accounting or finance. Go figure. He is now celebrating his 11^th year with Discover Financial, and works part time as a Real Estate Consultant with HomeNet Real Estate. He is also a full time dad, and I think does his best work when doing that job. I am certain his children would agree.

I was born in Salt Lake City and spent and lived in many parts of the valley. I attended Cottonwood High School, and LDS Business College. I later studied photography at Salt Lake Community College. I am currently self-employed as a graphic designer and portrait photographer. I also work part time as co-owner of an inspirational jewelry and gift company, which targets shedding light on the difficulties of infertility and pregnancy loss as well as infant loss and a line of adoption gifts and apparel.

Hubbs and I met at work twelve years ago. He had just returned home from serving his mission in Anaheim, California. I was a senior in high school, so yes, you can do the math and decipher that I was 18 when we met. Hubbs was 22 and I wanted NOTHING to do with the fellow. He was a returned missionary, and I was graduating from high school. I wanted to travel the world, finish school, and serve my own mission. Despite being very devout in my faith, if I am being 100% honest, marriage and motherhood were not anywhere near the top of my list of things to accomplish in the near future. However, Hubbs had different plans. His plans involved things like sitting by me every day at work, asking me out numerous times even after being shot down each previous time. Finally, one day on my last night working with Hubbs, I slipped him my phone number. I was feeling quite guilty for turning him down. I was pretty sure I was safe that he would never call me anyway. Surprisingly, he called a few days later and asked me out for the next evening. When I asked him what we would be doing (A girl has to plan her attire for such things) his response was, and I quote, “Uh, uh…” Followed by immense sweating and possible tears. The poor guy hadn’t planned a date! He was SO eager for me to just say YES (He was sure I was going to say no again) that he had neglected to actually plan an evening on the off chance I would say yes. Well, he pulled a date out of his hat and in the next breath said, “A birthday party!” So that was it. I went with him to a birthday party where they were only speaking Portuguese. It was –the- worst date of my life. At the end of the night he made sure to ask me out again for the following week, I decided I could give him one more chance, and it was on our second date I knew, with all of my soul that this man was to be my eternal companion. I can describe in perfect detail where I was sitting, how the air felt, everything, the moment I knew. I was scared out of my mind. However, I have since learned that my Heavenly Father loves me very much, and He doesn’t prompt me in ways such as this if it isn’t in my best interest. We were married 9 months later in the Salt Lake Temple and yes I was still 18.

Three years later we were blessed with our astounding little boy Joth who will turn 8 in a month and is making the courageously righteous decision to be baptized. I am so pleased with this tiny creature and his kindness and loving ways are a great example of Christ like love to anyone.

Our daughter Memms is almost six and has just started Kindergarten. She is a bright, cheerful, and helpful little girl. She is very funny, and she and her brother are the best of friends. They know how to always make us laugh, and one of their most endearing qualities is when they quote –my- favorite movies just to make me laugh. Especially lines from Napoleon Dynamite and 50 First Dates, or my favorite Disney movie UP.

Millz is our baby. She just turned two and is SO spunky. Spunky is a term people use to describe someone who is lively and vivacious. This definitely defines Millz. My favorite thing about her these days is her constant, “Hold you!” which she says only 1.2 million times a day. When she isn’t begging me to hold her, she is either talking about babies, drawing babies, asking to hold babies, playing doll babies or pretending to be a baby.

We are all very excited to be in your ward, to get to know each of you and we hope that you will all feel the same excitement we do in getting to know us as well.

I am so thankful to be able to speak to you a little today about service. One of my all time favorite scriptures can be found in Mosiah 2: 17- "And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."

Time and time again we are taught this lesson. There truly are not many other ways that one can grow closer to our Heavenly Father and our Savior than by serving and at certain times, allowing to be served.

President Spencer W. Kimball said, “I have learned that it is by serving that we learn how to serve. When we are engaged in the service of our fellowmen, not only do our deeds assist them, but also we put our own problems in a fresher perspective. When we concern ourselves more with others, there is less time to be concerned with ourselves. In the midst of the miracle of serving there is the promise of Jesus, that by losing ourselves, we find ourselves.”

We live in a very selfish time. We are bombarded with so many different things and can often be consumed by the –I- need to _______. It can become seriously challenging and overwhelming. It is at these times I need a huge boost of spirit and one of the fastest ways to receive the spirit in your life is to forget the –I- and see what you can do for someone else. This is called service and it is the swiftest high I can imagine one can ever possess in this life.

I am not very proud to admit this, but I used to be a very prideful and selfish person, I wasn’t horrible or mean, or prideful in an outward way, but I didn’t like people to know I was struggling. I didn’t like to share that I needed help, and if help was offered to me, I didn’t like taking it. Nearly four years ago our family suffered some very difficult losses. We lost a baby when I was 17 weeks pregnant. We were not only battling with the heavy loss of losing our baby, but I was recovering from a near death experience and was very weak. Man, I had no idea what service was until those very dark and trying days. I didn’t know what service was until complete strangers were sending us cards of sympathy. It wasn’t until flowers and countless meals showed up on our doorstep and when women came to fold my laundry, and scrub my floors and to watch my two children and another son we were fostering at the time so I could rest. It wasn’t until I recovered physically from these events that I realized how valuable service is and was to me. I realized at this time in my life more than ever before that allowing yourself to accept service, and giving others the chance to practice this divine art was just as important a lesson as giving service. I have never been more humbled or felt closer to my Father in Heaven or my Savior than I did during these times when angels passed through the walls of our home in the disguise of friends and strangers and women with mops and baby wipes and hugs and shoulders and tissues.

I promised myself that we would do all we could in the future to, “Succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees.”

Going through trial refines us and better prepares us to serve others in the future. It gives us empathy and an awareness to reach out to touch the lives of those who are suffering and brings us closer to the Savior in a depth that couldn’t be reached otherwise.

President Spencer W. Kimball also said in this same vein: “God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs. Therefore, it is vital that we serve each other in the kingdom…So often, our acts of service consist of simple encouragement or of giving mundane help with mundane tasks, but what glorious consequences can flow from mundane acts and from small but deliberate deeds!”

I love how President Kimball talks about service. It is so obvious that we need to be on a vigil as it were, seeking out what we can do each and every day to conquer those small and simple mundane acts of deliberate service. Brilliant!

I love preparing for a talk. For me, it is as if I get to have a weeklong conversation with Heavenly Father about the topic. He has shown me so many examples of service in the last week. Our family has recently gone through another amazingly painful trial. It has been very difficult channeling through, but I am amazed at the love my Father in Heaven has for us, and how often times through this trial it has been the hands of those around us who have helped to strengthen us. Sometimes it is very hard but one of the most recent examples of service came through an email just yesterday from an old friend which simply stated: “I have willing hands what would love to help in any way.”

How beautiful is that statement? Look at your own hands. How willing are they to help lift up our brothers and our sisters? Are they ready to love one another and serve one another as our Savior would?

I want to share my simple testimony of service with you. There truly is no greater way to grow closer to our Father in Heaven and to His Son, than to serve his children, and when appropriate, to humble ourselves and allow ourselves to be served by those sent to do such a sacred work.

I have seen it borne witness in my life countless times. I have seen service bless my life both when I receive it, but more importantly when I give it. It is my prayer and my hope that each of us can make it a point to increase our level of service, to choose even one small, simple and perhaps mundane thing each day to do for someone else. Even the smallest things, like holding a door open, or even a simple smile can lighten the heaviest of hearts and bring the greatest joy to the giver and to the receiver. Like the words of one of my favorite Hymns, “Have I done any good in the world today? Have I helped anyone in need? Have I cheered up the sad? Made someone feel glad? If not I have failed indeed.” It is my hope that we can each wake up and do something more each day to serve those in our lives.

Our Savior lives. He loves us. Our Father in Heaven is aware of each of us. Allow Him to express His love to you, by serving Him by serving others.

Let the Kids

2011-09-16T08:04:00.001-07:00

I am SO excited to be featured on Let the kids today. This is my first -big- feature. Would you mind going and spreading a little love for me? I think it is kind of a big deal. Also, many thanks to Julie and her family for letting me capture such a magical time in their lives and for letting me share this feature as well.

Mwah.

xo

Kim

A Mustard Skirt Upcycled into a Dress for Memms

2011-09-12T20:38:00.000-07:00

Family photos are officially coming up around the corner. I wasn't sure that I even wanted them this year. I went back and forth, back and forth, and then the last few weeks I have felt a bit better about the idea of having them done, so I decided to start choosing some colors that I might like to wear. I am pretty much obsessed with mustard yellow right now. I bought the skirt below for myself a few weeks back and have really enjoyed the pop of color it has brought into my wardrobe. However, I didn't want to wear this skirt for our family photos because I found a super cute navy skirt for me and an adorable mustard colored belt to match my favorite heels. I then had this strong desire to find a mustard colored dress for Memms as I had found a cute little navy blue number for Millz on eBay. I dare you to try to find a mustard colored dress for a six year old. It is next to impossible unless you go to some specialty bridal store and pay out the nose. So, I had this thought, "What if I buy that same skirt and make a dress for Memms?"

As you can see the skirt was $19 from Walmart. They have this adorable new line of clothing at some of their stores called: Bella Bird. I bought the biggest sized skirt they had, which was XL. I wish oh wish they had a 2XL as it would have given me just a bit more extra fabric to make my sleeves a bit longer (You will see what I mean as the post continues.

I purchased some needles specifically for sewing tulle and satin. I also bought matching thread and a zipper. Please note: I did NOT use the zipper. I will be returning it to the store because I did not end up needing it. (Are you crazy? If I don't need to set a zipper I am NOT going to. This equals a level of difficulty that I can't even handle.) I was also going to research sleeves via google, but during my trip to Walmart to get the skirt, thread, needles, etc, I came across this super CHEAP pattern with a dress that the bodice was straight across and sleeves exactly as I had envisioned them. SO, I bought the pattern, only to see that the sleeves were basically a rectangle with slightly rounded ends. The pattern was only $2 so I feel it was worth it to have the photo to reference as well as the pattern to cut from. So, in essence, this dress cost me $25 plus 90 minutes of my time.

I was ready to get started. Now, let me tell you something about me and my sewing style. You know Moosh in Indy? Well, I was lucky to know Casey before there was a Moosh and a Vivi and before there was ever word of Indy. She and I met at Beehive Clothing where they sew all of the temple clothing, and where my religion sews their garments. I am sure you have heard of garments, if not, feel free to read that link a little more in depth. There is nothing to fancy about them, but they have to be sewn, and I was a seamstress there for a few years. A place Casey lovingly refers to as, "The Celestial Sweatshop." If you know nothing about line sewing, basically one person sews one operation then sends the articles of clothing down the line and the next person does the next step. Needles are unheard of, and you sew as fast as humanly possible because you work on piece rate. I became a mad sewer, and a good sewer, but also a lazy one and I lack sufficient patience to be a perfect sewer. It works for me, it may not work for you. Which is why I see I am missing a few steps in my photo tutorial. Forgive me?

Now, down to business. See all the layers of this skirt? I decided (which isn't pictured) to try the skirt on Memms and pin it about 1/2" away from her body leaving the existing zipper as a side enclosure under her arm, with the excess fabric ready to be cut off. So, after pinning the excess 1/2" from her other side (side opposite the zipper) I made the brave jump to cut off the excess. (This is the portion I used to make the sleeves.) I didn't have much left over, which is why I wish there had been a 2XL skirt so I would have had a bit more sleeve material to work with. Also, I should mention Memms is about a 6/7 in little girls so this skirt worked perfectly for her size.

Here is the skirt after I cut off the excess. You can see on the left the original tag, which was in the middle of the skirt, and the original side zipper that I kept on the side which will now go just under Memms' armpit. Are you with me? We are looking at the inside where the tag is and the lining.

I then put right sides together and sewed her up.

Here you can see the new side seam. I sewed the lining and then the outer shell. This fabric frays a lot, and since I don't have a serger I left a wider seam allowance and then zig zag stitched on the outside of the seam to help keep it all together.

Next, I cut out the sleeves. I used the size 7 sleeve pattern. This is where I wish I had lengthened the sleeves a few more inches because: 1: I wasn't thinking, I went cut happy, but 2: I would not have had enough fabric to cut them longer anyway, so it is what it is at this point. I cut the sleeves, then unpicked the tulle and removed it from the base fabric.

The other thing I wished I had bought was stabilizer. I only had some very thick stabilizer on hand, and hindsight I would have ran back to the store to get a thinner version. The thicker worked, but is quite stiff for this thin material. I decided to use stabilizer since the sleeve material was SO thin, I was worried about fraying, and since I don't have a serger, I wanted a little more stability. Would I use it again? Probably not. I would forgo it. Anyway, again, I learned a lot.

In the top photo you can see where I ironed the stabilizer to the backside of the sleeve, and in the bottom photo you can see where I put right sides together and sewed along the seam, again using the zig zag stitch outside my straight stitch.

This is where I regretted my mother of all thicknesses stabilizer. It was a beast to turn inside out, however, I made it and then pressed the sleeve flat leaving the seam right on the edge. In this photo the seam is on the left hand side.

Instead of machine gathering the sleeve, I just hand pleated the sleeve in three pleats and then pinned it, careful to lay it out next to the dress shell so that the pleats went in opposite directions and that the sleeves were facing the right way for when they went on the dress. In this case, the seam of the sleeve faces Memms' neck once it is sewed on, so that the outside of the sleeve is a little bit flared out creating more of a 'sleeve' like shoulder.

Remember how I said I am not a patient sewer? Add having to tutorialize putting the sleeves on, and well, you don't get those photos. Basically to add the sleeves, I tried the dress on Memms again, then eyeballed about where the sleeves needed to hit in the front and in the back. I then pinned them in place with safety pins. Then, I unpicked the seams that were the top of the skirt just enough so that I could slide the sleeve ends in and sew a straight line across so that they looked smooth and as if the 'dress' was bought that way.

SO neat huh?

The dress wasn't laying superbly flat so I got out a little more stabilizer and sewed a piece across the front so it lays a lot more flat now. I think this happened because the sleeves were so heavy and bulky it was pulling the fabric too much. Also, this is where I would have made the sleeves a little longer so that it gave a little more in this area. These photos were taken before I added the stabilizer line across the top and it indeed lays a lot flatter than these photos show.

Anyway, it looks adorable on her and she LOVES it. She can't wait to wear it to school and to church and is dying that I won't let her wear it until after family photos. (I am so so mean aren't I?)

Here it is finished. Thank you Walgreen's for cutting my negatives once again and making my color look whack. (Blergh.) I was just too excited to share these with you, I sent Hubbs to Walgreen's after I finished so I could share them with you before they got lost in the shuffle of life.

The funnest $25 I have spent in a long time. I can't wait for family photos, they will mean just a little bit more this year than they ever have before.

All shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at 1.4 on Fuji Superia 800 Film . Processed at Walgreen's (not their finest scanning job. Blech.)

Beautiful words that touched my soul.

2011-09-06T11:24:00.000-07:00

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 at f/2.8 on Kodak Portra 400 Film

I woke up this morning feeling heavy. I made the choice not to get online the entire holiday weekend. This weekend was just for me, for my kids, for my husband. No outside noises or secret competitions. This was for us. We did not do anything grand or spectacular. Hubbs and I spent Saturday at a couples retreat. It was so nice to be with him, alone, together, getting to know one another again. Sunday was just like any other, and Labor Day was no different. Nothing spectacular, just quiet, thoughtful, togetherness.

I woke up this morning to all of the 'noise' again. Literally hundreds of emails to sift through, 50+ Facebook notifications, work. The stress was just so heavy. When this happens I cry. I feel the weight too much to carry and this is the time that I long for my life to be as it was. I miss my very best friend in the entire world. I miss the relationship I had with my husband where I could just run and cry on his shoulder and heave heavy sobs and ugly cries of pain to him because it all just seems too much to handle at this very moment in time. So, today, I cried alone. I sobbed over the dishes as I loaded them into the dishwasher. I cried into my baby's shoulder as she wanted me to, "Hold you, hold you, hold you!" I cried and I tried not to let my kids see.

This? Well, I will get through this. I always do. It will just take a day, and some deep breathes and life will carry on as it always does. The house will be messy tomorrow, I will have more work to do, I will still be trying with all of my being to find my best friend again, to break down every and all walls that need to be broken to be with him again. That journey will begin anew, but for now, I wallow. I cry. I hurt. I am pained. I am sad. I am feeling greatly alone, so alone that I was brought to my knees begging my Heavenly Father to "Please take this pain away from me for just this moment." You know, I have a great relationship with that guy. Almost immediately the thought came, "Go read that post going around on Facebook." To which I responded, "Of all the things going on right at this moment, the last thing I have time for is Facebook." Again the prompting, "Go and read." And I did. I read, and I cried, and felt a reprieve.

I encourage you to go and read as well: We Must See Past What it Seems...

Probably one of the most beautiful posts I have ever read in my life. This is what I needed. I needed it today, yesterday and tomorrow. I needed a sign around my neck that says, "I know you are hurting with everything you have going on in your life, and that it is hard. I am hurting too. Let's be gentle to one another. You are not alone, I am not alone, it will be easier if we can do this together." It would probably say a lot of other things as well and I would end up needing a wheelbarrow to carry the sign around because it would turn into a novel longer than Anna Karenina.

I feel stronger. I feel like I can now make it through the day and accomplish just a bit more than I thought I could when I woke up. I have already. I am not alone on this walk of sorrows, this thing we call life. I am being guided on my journey. I am being accompanied by so many people wearing similar signs and sorrows. Together we will find the joy. That is my hope anyway. From where I stand at the moment it seems so hard to believe and trust, yet I am taking the leap of faith in knowing that it is there.

Until then, "Be gentle with me. I am doing my best."

Wright Family

2011-09-02T12:51:00.000-07:00

All shot on a Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 at f/2.8, on Kodak Portra 400 Film

I love photographing families. Especially my own. I felt so lucky when my aunt asked me to photograph hers just before her second son left for college and before he leaves for his LDS mission in a few months, and they won't see him for two years.

I adore photographing the real side of people, the stuff you want to remember. I love the laughter, the closed eyes. I love to capture the essence and vibrant life that encompasses the word family. It is so much more than looking pretty for the camera.

If you would like me to capture your family in a similar way, I would love to meet you. Drop me a line: kimorlandini@gmail.com

View the entire session and order prints here.

Salt Lake Farmer's Market

2011-08-31T13:57:00.000-07:00

All shot on Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at f/2.8 on Kodak Portra 400 Film . (Processed at Walgreen's. Rad.)

I am probably one of the luckiest girls on the planet. What I lack in some areas, I am greatly blessed and overcompensated in others, like having amazing friends. Meet Lindsey, the mastermind behind Green Apple Photography. Isn't she completely adorable? I also adore her little Lucy just as much. We had a little date a few weeks ago to the Salt Lake Farmer's Market . Can you believe I have lived in Salt Lake for almost 30 years and I have never been? For shame.

Lindsey taught me the ins and outs of navigating the Farmer's Market. You have to scope out the fresh fruits, photograph them, then move onto the fresh cut flowers, then the baked goods. Take a trail around all of the fun hand crafted item booths like the amazing hand crafted pillows that I fell in love with (see above) I got to meet Tara, the mastermind behind Modernality Pillows and will be contacting her soon to have her make some for my bedroom. I can't wait. I never expected to find something like that at the Farmer's Market! Who knew?

We then rounded the bend to Sweet Salt Lake in which Lindsey advised me was -the- best mint limeade in the world. I was a total skeptic I assure you. I was a sheltered child. The limeade was DIVINE I tell you. I even talked Lindsey into going back for seconds. (Bring lots of cash, you will want more.) Then we ended the morning with a Ruby Snap Cookie and a sit on the shady grass and enjoyed the bagpipes and people watching.

Thank you for the fun and relaxing and rejuvenating morning Lindsey. I can't wait to take my kids for their first experience at the Salt Lake Farmer's Market this Saturday.

Layla, New Baby Goodness

2011-08-29T10:11:00.000-07:00

Shot on Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.0. Some on Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at 1.4. All Kodak Portra 400 Film .

View entire session and order prints here .

An Afternoon at Deer Creek Resevoir

2011-08-26T20:28:00.000-07:00

All shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens with a mix of Fuji Superia 800 and Portra 400 Films

I am very blessed to have some amazing friends in my life. Truly, I have to wonder sometimes how I got so lucky to have found these wonderful people. Holly and her husband Toby are no exception. We have known them for almost five years now when I began working with Holly photographing weddings. We still work together and get the chance to chat via Skype every single day. I can honestly say the day drags when I don't get to talk to my friend Holly.

Toby recently got an itch to get a boat. The hunt was on, and they found the perfect one. Now weekends are spent enjoying the lake and all the fun that can be had, or not in my case as I rediscovered how deathly afraid of boats I am. I can be pulled by them just fine, but get me inside and I squeal like a little girl. Go figure. Poor Toby putting up with driving a snails pace for me. Thanks friend.

We rented a Sea-doo for the day and my kids had so much fun on the 'wet ski'. I still giggle over that one.

We ended the day on the beach with the kids while the boys loaded up the watercraft. It was complete bliss to watch the kids interact, enjoy the water and the sand and just be kids. The closest thing to a beach we have in Utah.

I'll take more any day. Thanks for the fun day friends.

Vinicius' Birth Story | Utah Birth Story Photography

2011-08-25T13:15:00.000-07:00

View entire session and order prints here .

Hilton Family

2011-08-19T12:08:00.000-07:00

Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at f/2.8. Shot on Kodak Portra 400 Film .

I would adore photographing your family's special days like this one. Drop me a line, I can't wait to hear from you.

View the entire session and order prints here .

Ever Changing

2011-08-17T10:55:00.000-07:00

Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens at 2.8, Fuji Superia 800 Consumer Film

I find that life is so beautiful. Even with trials and disappointments I am constantly reminded of how beautiful it is each day. Never more so than when I am scrubbing ice cream and pee out of my new sofa, or celebrating the blessed news of a good friend, or of a stranger, or whether I am just sitting down blogging with tears running down my cheeks knowing that I am loved by a supreme being, a Heavenly Father who is mindful of me, of my struggles, of my trials. A supreme being that whispers, "Keep going. You can do this! You are loved. I love you. Lean on me." It is through those whispers that I know I can keep going, even when it is hard and life is ever changing and all I want to do is give up. I don't. I can't. I won't.

Did you know Memms got glasses? Crazy I know. As we were getting her ready to go to big school, we had to do all of the paperwork and exams. I made her a quick last minute appointment to get her eyes checked, as well as mine the same day. (I have been having visual disturbances in my left eye for a few months and had some concerns.) We both got to go in and get our eyes dilated. My first time and it was trip to the ippy. When the doctor told me Memms needed glasses a part of me cried. I felt like the worst mother. "So, all those headaches she has are caused by her eyes?" How did I not put two and two together? Her prescription is pretty yucky. They only gave her half a prescription to start. I am amazed that she can see through those blurry lenses. I am thankful for modern technology that makes it so easy for my baby to see. Guess what? No more headaches.

Whodathunk?

As for my eye? I have a significant Vitreal Detachment. It is causing a spot in my left eye which also happens to be my photography shooting eye, this makes for an awesome shooting experience. I am quite young to be experiencing such phenomenon. However, the good news is that it will slowly fade over the next three years. The bad news, the location is near my retina, so I am on strict watch for some other symptoms that could cause permanent damage to my vision. Completely not worried anymore...just strange.

Girl's Night Out with The R House

2011-08-11T10:38:00.000-07:00

It is the night before the Families Supporting Adoption Conference where Lindsey and I will be hanging out all weekend at The R House Couture booth. Lindsey and I will be making and taking custom orders on the spot as well as (((drum roll))) debuting our new clothing line. Poor Leisha, (or maybe poor us) is away at Young Women's Camp. Anyway, our new clothing line is delectable. This year, unlike last year all of our items will be available for purchase and not just display. We are so THRILLED about it!

Tonight is also the Girl's Night Out with The R House! Lindsey and I have been running around like mad women, so if you are in town, we hope you will come to this FREE event at the Courtyard Marriott in Layton which is within walking distance of the Davis Convention Center where the FSA Conference is this weekend.

We have awesome SWAG bags for the first 50 through the door, raffle tickets on sale for $1 (the raffle will start at 9:30 p.m.), manicures, a crafty little service project for BirthMom Buds, conversation starters, chatting, connections and a great way to make friends before the big FSA conference. It is going to be SO. Much. Fun.

The food is being provided by Chubby Hubby Cupcakes and Schmidt's Pastry Cottage. Need I say more? Chubby Hubby Cupcakes are my all-time favorite cupcake and as Lindsey says I am a cupcake snob so come and partake! Schmidt's Pastry Cottage has ALWAYS been my one of my favorite places for eclairs and delicious pastries. Lindsey loves them also (proof), plus it is owned by adoptive parents ...(You know how much we love adoption.) Go ahead and give Schmidt's a LIKE on their new Facebook page to show your appreciation!

In your SWAG bag (actual bag donated by A Act of Love), you will see goodies and special offers from The Darling Daughter, Singers Company, Call me Kristin, Crowning Touch Photography, Birth Mother Baskets, Many Hearts One Beat, FamilyNow.net and even Utah Truffles from Candise, a hopeful adoptive mom and manicure sets from Hallie, an adoptive mom ...just because they wanted to support the evening!

The RAFFLE is incredible! We have prizes from The R House, The R House Couture, The R House Adoption Consultants, Stella & Dot, Singers Company, Lily and Thistle MiniMe Paper Dolls, The Very Best Thing for TJ, All Smiles Photography, Singers Company, Call Me Kristin, Birth Mother Baskets, The Healing Group, Crowning Touch Photography and more!

A special thank you to all of our sponsors for this evening. It will be a wonderful way to celebrate the special love of adoption.

Can't wait to see you!

Journal Entries Through a Failed Adoption

2011-08-04T08:45:00.000-07:00

Photo by my beautiful friend Sharon Johnson . I am SO jealous of her stunning blog. Sigh.

Guest posting this week over at The R House . Have you seen Lindsey's new blog as well? I really need to get on the bandwagon. Anyway, thank you Lindsey for the opportunity to share my story. It has needed to be shared for a very long time, and I am grateful it is now out in the open to hopefully help others through similar situations.

August 15, 2005

What a busy past few weeks it has been in our family. Really, I don’t know where to even begin, but I will try. On Thursday, August 4 I got a phone call from our caseworker Kate. I called her back and she said she needed to meet with us as soon as possible. Flavio was already at work for the day and after talking with another caseworker, they made it clear that they needed to meet with us THAT day. So, I called Flavio at work, told him what was going on and he made plans to leave work early so we could meet with some of the caseworkers at our agency. Neither one of us had any idea what this meeting could be about. The moment we found out we were expecting, we called our caseworker and they put our file on a permanent hold, so there was really no way this could be about an adoption. We couldn’t be getting a baby, could we?

We went into the meeting, there was some chitchat, they asked how we were doing, how I was feeling, how the baby was doing. Then, they asked if we liked surprises. We answered, “Of course, we LOVE surprises!”

A little bit of back-story; our adoption file had been put on hold. However, somewhere along the line someone had neglected to take our online profile offline. There was a birth mother in another state who saw our profile and felt strongly that our family was meant to have her baby. Her caseworker called ours, and our worker told her worker that we were on a permanent hold because we had been able to get pregnant. This birth mother’s worker did not know what to do, so he went back to the birth mother and told her about the situation. She went home and prayed and prayed and again, felt the confirmation that her baby was meant to come to our family. She was so worried that WE wouldn’t want her baby. So, the plan was set, we were called and immediately Flavio and I began bawling and felt the spirit confirm that this was our baby. We immediately said, “YES!” There were so many reasons why this felt so incredibly right. For one, we felt deeply in our hearts the spirit confirming to us that this little boy was our child. About two months ago Flavio had a dream that we were having twins. I remember waking up to him telling me about the dream. He said, “I saw two babies!” They were on a blanket lying side by side. One was a boy and one was a girl, but the weird thing was one of them was bigger than the other. I scoffed at him and said, “Duh honey, that can’t be twins! Twins are the same size and usually aren’t that much bigger than the other.” So, I dismissed it as one of those weird dreams we have nightly that usually mean nothing than our subconscious playing tricks with us. I dismissed it again after my first appointment with the doctor and only seeing one baby in the ultrasound.

However, on August 4, it seemed almost as if this dream was coming true. There were other slight confirmations for us as well, that are pointing us to the direction that this is so very right. I know with all of my heart that this is right for our family. I feel so strongly this baby is meant to come to us.

Baby is due on September 5, 2005. It is a boy. He is half Hispanic half Caucasian just like our little babies. We love our birth mother *Norah so very much. We have done so much to prepare for this little one, and we have written Norah a few times already. We feel she is very frightened. It is almost as if making this decision and us knowing he is coming have done a number on her heart. She talked about this situation, and how she felt she was relying on everyone else’s testimony about it, but her own. She took a step back and decided to take some more time to think about things just to be sure of her decisions.

This has been really hard for us. We want so much for Norah to be happy and to feel peace in her decisions. We love her so very much. We also want so very much for this little boy to come to our family. We are so ready for him, and feel like he will come to us. We are praying so very hard for our Norah at this time.

August 22, 2005

Wow, it is amazing how much life can change in just eighteen little days. I don’t even know how to begin this journal entry other than the knowledge that Heavenly Father knows us and loves us and He gives us certain trials for a reason.

We got a call from our caseworker today. She told us that the reason we haven’t heard from Norah is because she and her fiancé have decided not to place the baby with us, but have decided, instead to parent him.

This day has been a very difficult one. Really, I don’t know what to think or how to feel, but all I know is that I have to have faith that this is all part of the plan and that someday we may learn why all of this had to happen. It just hurts so much. It is such a heavy loss; it feels like a part of me has died. Like someone has died. It feels like a miscarriage, but worse. I guess it feels worse because we won’t have this little baby ever. Oh how I was prepared for him. How excited we were to have this little boy join our family. How much joy we felt over Norah choosing us and trusting us to be his mom and dad.

I pray that Norah will have peace in her decisions; I pray that this little boy will have the most wonderful life with his mother and his new father. I want him to always be happy and to know just how much his mother loves him, and even though he may never know, how much two parents many miles away loved him and still love him.

Hopefully, with time Flavio and I can heal from this. Hopefully, somewhere down the road we too, can be blessed with more children. What an experience this has been. I just pray it will make us stronger. I really don’t know what to say right now. I am just so weak from crying, my head aches from the shuddering tears. I had to take everything back to the store that we bought for this baby. How I ache from having to do this. I am off to box up all of the tiny clothes because my heart hurt too much to see them.

October 26, 2005

Peace Comes

Norah had her baby the end of September. She ended up being a few weeks overdue. She and her fiancé are planning on getting married soon, and hope to be able to be sealed to their little boy in the temple someday down the road. We sent her a small package with a blanket I had made for her and a matching one for the baby. What was I to do with them? They were made for them. Flavio and I have been struggling to come to grips with they “whys” of this situation. I think what has been so hard for us is the confusion of feeling like this baby was our baby, and then the hurt of him not coming and trying to understand it all. There have been so many tears and so many prayers for peace and understanding. Having felt so many feelings of loss over this failed placement have left our hearts heavy. It feels like a death. It has been a grievous pain that has been hard to overcome. I feel like a huge relief came on Sunday. I feel like I finally got an answer of some sort. Something I was sure would not come in this lifetime, but one that will help us to get through this lifetime. The opening Hymn in Sacrament meeting was “Our Savior’s Love” and it was during this Hymn that I felt the confirming hand of love from my Heavenly Father, as He spoke to me in the second verse the words: “We are bound to him by loving ties.”

Maybe this little boy was suppose to come to be a part of our family, to be sealed to us, to be ours…forever. Perhaps, for whatever reason that couldn’t happen, but through the love of our Savior, and through the gospel, we are bound to this baby through loving ties. Because we loved this baby so very much and because, in some ways he is ours, we will forever be tied through him by this love.

This was an amazing experience. I feel as though a gigantic weight has been lifted from my heart and my shoulders. I cried through the meeting, tears of comfort and peace flowed. I feel like I have understanding and I can breathe again. I know I will NEVER forget this little boy. Never. However, I finally feel like I can move on from this experience and find new joy and new hope.

Present Day

In January 2008 we got an email from Norah. She was very sad and dealing with a great weight on her heart. She was questioning a lot of decisions she had made in her life, one of which was that she made a mistake in not placing this little boy with us. We were in a tough spot and not sure what to say. We had been emailing with Norah off and on after we found we had a mutual friend with Norah, her visiting teaching companion. Even though Norah lived many states away at a time when adoptions weren’t as open as they are presently, after our friend came to about a year after Norah’s baby was born, we were able to send a small gift home with our friend for Norah and for the baby. This began a phone relationship and an emailing relationship. This email was particularly hard for us to read. We weren’t sure what to say to her to comfort her, or to comfort us in a wound that felt was being ripped open again. We decided that honesty was the best thing in this situation, and even though it was hard to say, “We would still love to be the parents of this little boy if that is ever something you consider.” We still said it. Even though we once again, did not end up being the parents to this little boy, were able to help Norah through a difficult time and we remain friends to this day. We are even friends on Facebook and she is expecting her third baby any day now.

We have learned so much from this experience. This little boy is so happy and so big! He is in school and thriving and he has two loving parents. We have been blessed with two more beautiful children and even though it is still painful to think of what might have been, we are able to find happiness and joy in this trial of our hearts. Time does heal, maybe not completely, but it lessens the pain, it dulls the terror to the point hope can build up once again.

*Name has been changed.

Fresh Produce Clothing | Review

2011-08-03T08:43:00.000-07:00

I was thrilled when Fresh Produce emailed me and asked me to review their fun and juicy clothing on my blog. As you know, or maybe not, in the past year I have lost 35 lbs. It has been a very long and slow journey, but one that has made me appreciate myself more. What better way to celebrate such a loss than with new clothing?

Basic Legging in Oyster

I think these leggings may be my new favorite. I have slipped them on under skirts, just like in the photo above. I have paired them with long shirtdresses and even tunics. In fact, as I write this, I am wearing them. I am not a legging lover by nature, but these leggings are so soft, and they pull my fat in, especially around my tummy and my 'muffin top'. They aren't constrictive at all, and they aren't your usual legging that falls down. I truly love them.

Bali Shine On Shirtdress in Oyster

I am going to be honest and say that when I first saw the Bali Shine on Shirtdress, I didn't like it at all. It just isn't my 'style'. I tried it on and still felt a little uncomfortable. However, it wasn't until I got the photos back that I realized how adorable it actually is on me, and quite flattering as well. It is comfy and breezy and looks cute paired with a pair of jeans or leggings. Perfect for lounging or a fun night out.

Wrap Me Up Dress in Oyster

I was thrilled when I got to try the Wrap Me Up Dress. It is probably one of my favorite pieces in the collection. The fabric on this dress is amazing. It is a mix of rayon and lycra with stretch in all the right places. I can tell that it will wash well, and will resist piling, something I look for when I buy clothing like this, I want it to last and get better with age...kind of like me. I love the 3/4 length sleeves that help hide my arms which I feel are still a little too big. I love the details on the shoulders and the pleating under the bust. There is a side seam so that when you are wrestling kids you aren't showing the world your goods. I like that. It is a great dress that can be dressed up for church or a wedding, or dressed down for lounging at home reading a book, or hitting the beach.

While I was sent things in Oyster per my request since I look better in blues and grays, there are SO many fun and bright choices on their website. I love the beachy colors especially the teals. Go and check them out and experience them for yourself. I suggest picking up a pair of the leggings, you may be like me and never take them off.

Fresh Produce now ships to over 200 countries worldwide. Hear that my Brazilian friends? Check out some of their other adorable lines:

Daytime Dresses

Party Dresses

Tunics

Capris

Cardigans

**Disclaimer: I was asked by Fresh Produce to review their clothing, but as always, my mom taught me not to lie, so therefore I am telling you my honest opinion of their clothing, which, I did. **

Newborn Asher

2011-07-28T12:01:00.000-07:00

Earlier this week I introduced you to little Mr. Asher and his birth story. Exactly a week later I was at his home photographing him and his lovely family again. Aren't they so magazine-perfect? Seriously, shooting photos in a client's home is my favorite. What better way to remember life, then to take photos in the home in which it is lived? Enjoy.

Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.0. Kodak Portra 400 Film .

View entire session and order prints here .

Asher's Birth Story

2011-07-25T12:52:00.000-07:00

Shot on a Nikon F100, 50mm 1.4 lens all on 1.4 on Kodak Portra 400 and Kodak bw400cn films .

View entire session and order prints here .

Camille -The- Make it Work Mom

2011-07-15T13:17:00.000-07:00

Shot on Contax 645 80mm 2.0 lens at 2.0 on Kodak Portra 400 Film

Hi. Did you know that I love to blog? Truly I do. I know, I know, I used to be more active in blogging, and believe me I wish I was blogging almost daily like I used to. Sigh. Life...and the events of the past week and a half are just too crazy and personal to blog. Suffice it to say, I am amazed that so much crap can continually be piled on me and my little corner of the universe. However, that being said, I will take my load of shee and be thankful for it. It could always be so much worse.

Now, remember that love of blogging thing? It is because of blogging I met the LOVELY Camille. I love this lady. She is spunky, she is strong, she is beautiful, she is talented, and I am one lucky lady to know her. I am even luckier that she hired me to take her first professional photos sans braces. She looks amazing! She also blogs at Make it Work Mom . Check out her fun blog. I love going there whenever I need a pick me up. The colors and layout are so fun and fresh and inspiring.

View entire session and order prints here.

BVB

2011-07-11T10:08:00.000-07:00

Contax 645, 80mm 2.0 lens. Kodak Portra 400 film pushed to 3200.

View entire session and order prints here .

Welcome Kalista

2011-07-01T12:51:00.000-07:00

View entire session and order prints here .

Did you see that I was guest posting over at the r house about pregnancy and infant loss this week? If not...go check it out, and many thank yous mrs. r for having me.

Hope you all have an amazing weekend as you celebrate our nation's birth...just like Kalista's parents. These birth stories always remind me of how precious life is and just how blessed I am to have my three littles.

Much love.

xo